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Week 11: Commanding Bazoombas in Houston

Thorn

Dirty Old Man
The Commanders will gird their loins with burgundy and gold with yellow lipstick. The Texans will fall to the ground and give up, either laughing or in horror. Two set of fans with teams they don't deserve.

Commanders: 50 billion
Texans: -10

Mills throws for 150 yards and three TDs, two to the other team. Pierce runs for another 150 for nothing, but is the most exciting thing in the game.
 

Earl34

All Pro
Commandos will come out sleep walking after their big game win against a division rival, and on a short week. That will keep the Texans in the game with a chance, but they'll find a way to not get it done, as per usual. It'll be a game decided by 1 score.
If they come out sleep walking. Will the Texans be able to capitalize?

"The Texans’ first-half strategies in the passing game led by second-year quarterback Davis Mills have become an issue for Houston in the Texans’ last three losses to the Tennessee Titans, Philadelphia Eagles, and New York Giants. Mills has averaged 4.7 yards passing in the first half of the last three games and has been held to under 40 yards in the first and second quarters in two of those contests (Titans-17, Giants-35). "

Houston’s defense has given up 93 first-half points in nine games, averaging 10.3 points per game. They have held opponents to 14 points or less in eight of those games, but during those first nine contests, the Texans’ offense has only been able to score 73 points which is good for an average of just over eight points per game.

Inefficient first halves plague Texans with Davis Mills under center (usatoday.com)
 

TheRealJoker

Hall of Fame
If they come out sleep walking. Will the Texans be able to capitalize?

"The Texans’ first-half strategies in the passing game led by second-year quarterback Davis Mills have become an issue for Houston in the Texans’ last three losses to the Tennessee Titans, Philadelphia Eagles, and New York Giants. Mills has averaged 4.7 yards passing in the first half of the last three games and has been held to under 40 yards in the first and second quarters in two of those contests (Titans-17, Giants-35). "

Houston’s defense has given up 93 first-half points in nine games, averaging 10.3 points per game. They have held opponents to 14 points or less in eight of those games, but during those first nine contests, the Texans’ offense has only been able to score 73 points which is good for an average of just over eight points per game.

Inefficient first halves plague Texans with Davis Mills under center (usatoday.com)
Its like the reverse Kubiak. Kubiak always had a nice script to start the games. But whatever the Pep script is to start games… its awful.
 

76Texan

Hall of Fame
If they come out sleep walking. Will the Texans be able to capitalize?

"The Texans’ first-half strategies in the passing game led by second-year quarterback Davis Mills have become an issue for Houston in the Texans’ last three losses to the Tennessee Titans, Philadelphia Eagles, and New York Giants. Mills has averaged 4.7 yards passing in the first half of the last three games and has been held to under 40 yards in the first and second quarters in two of those contests (Titans-17, Giants-35). "

Houston’s defense has given up 93 first-half points in nine games, averaging 10.3 points per game. They have held opponents to 14 points or less in eight of those games, but during those first nine contests, the Texans’ offense has only been able to score 73 points which is good for an average of just over eight points per game.

Inefficient first halves plague Texans with Davis Mills under center (usatoday.com)
The perfect tanking strategy.
 

austins23

Hall of Fame
The Washington football team kept the ball for damn near 40 minutes (may be exaggerating)against the eagles. They do that against the Texans they will score a 50 burger. The run defense will be exposed again.
the LBs will have to ask Deshaun where those massages are because they will be sore after the game

edit: I wasn’t exaggerating, it was 40:24
Wow!!
 

IDEXAN

Hall of Fame
Contributor's Club
Texans figure things out in this game. Texans 31 Commandos 24
You know what I'm gonna get on board here with my pal Op-Tex !
It's probably because I got our big bird yesterday and is he ever a beauty but I'm just now in the holiday mood and feeling well very positive and yes optimistic. BTY that big Tom Butterball was expensive this year but don't put all the blame on Dopey Joe because the guy at the controls at the Fed waited way too long to start jacking up interest rates.
OK sorry I digressed but like I said I'm with OP-Tex: Texans 31 Commandoes 14.
Go Texans !
 

Porky

Hall of Fame
This clash is between the former red-skinned indigenous peoples of NE North America, and the white man from Europe, who has invaded lands near the gulf coast. The white man has won a battle with the Mexicans and called this new land Texas.

The former red-skinned indigenous peoples of NE North America got wind from their tribes close to Texas, and are leaving their luxury teepee, and have set out on a long journey to Texas to defeat the imperialists who are nothing but marauders who do not care for the land. The Texans built their own luxury teepee, and it's already abandoned for a new teepee. The Texans are weak, and their leader is Davis of Mills who is known to miss every shot he fires, so the red-skinned indigenous peoples are not worried. They may call themselves Texans, but they will be scalped and fed to the bison who roam the lands within 3 hours of invasion. This battle will be short and quick.

The red-skinned indigenous peoples will kill 24 Texans, but the Texans will only kill 3 former red-skinned indigenous peoples. The Texans leader, known as Lovie of Big Sandy throughout the land, will surrender quickly, quipping that they did not finish this battle as he knows they can, and one day way in the future will. He will then share a peace pipe with Chief Ron of Rivera hoping that the Texans never have to do battle with these savages again.
 

TheRealJoker

Hall of Fame
The only way the Texans win a game this year is where the other team is just having a bad day on the same day the Texans actually have it together. Those two thing aren't going to happen at the same time very often, maybe only a few times this season.
Colts, Broncos, Bears and Raiders all played poorly against the Texans. But the Texans managed to suck even worse! Or in the case of that Colts game… an equal amount.
 

austins23

Hall of Fame
This clash is between the former red-skinned indigenous peoples of NE North America, and the white man from Europe, who has invaded lands near the gulf coast. The white man has won a battle with the Mexicans and called this new land Texas.

The former red-skinned indigenous peoples of NE North America got wind from their tribes close to Texas, and are leaving their luxury teepee, and have set out on a long journey to Texas to defeat the imperialists who are nothing but marauders who do not care for the land. The Texans built their own luxury teepee, and it's already abandoned for a new teepee. The Texans are weak, and their leader is Davis of Mills who is known to miss every shot he fires, so the red-skinned indigenous peoples are not worried. They may call themselves Texans, but they will be scalped and fed to the bison who roam the lands within 3 hours of invasion. This battle will be short and quick.

The red-skinned indigenous peoples will kill 24 Texans, but the Texans will only kill 3 former red-skinned indigenous peoples. The Texans leader, known as Lovie of Big Sandy throughout the land, will surrender quickly, quipping that they did not finish this battle as he knows they can, and one day way in the future will. He will then share a peace pipe with Chief Ron of Rivera hoping that the Texans never have to do battle with these savages again.
We’re you at @Thorn’s house before you wrote all that!?
 

Lucky

Ride, Captain, Ride!
Staff member
No way Carson Wentz will be ready to return against the Texans. Taylor Heinicke will start.
There goes the Texans only hope for a W.
Its like the reverse Kubiak. Kubiak always had a nice script to start the games. But whatever the Pep script is to start games… its awful.
Two runs up the middle and an out pattern short of the sticks? The word awful is offended by your comment.
but they will be scalped and fed to the bison
Bisons are herbivores.
The Commodore 64 Texans, something something.

I just couldn't pass up mentioning a vastly outdated computer with a hand held computer.
You would have been envious of a Commodore 64 if you had a VIC 20.

 
Maybe being too optimistic here, but I think this is a winnable game. This potentially sets up as a classic 'letdown' spot for the commanders - short week, on the road following a big road win against the league's best team. If we can limit the brutal errors that all of our young players are making at key times, and Pep's play calling doesn't go limp in the first half, this is a winnable game.
 

JB

Old Curmudgeon
Contributor's Club
Maybe being too optimistic here, but I think this is a winnable game. This potentially sets up as a classic 'letdown' spot for the commanders - short week, on the road following a big road win against the league's best team. If we can limit the brutal errors that all of our young players are making at key times, and Pep's play calling doesn't go limp in the first half, this is a winnable game.
Some mighty big IF's there
 

Double Barrel

Clown Hunter
Staff member
Contributor's Club
After watching WFT play the Eagles on MNF, they'd have to shoot themselves in the foot for the Texans to win this one. Houston just doesn't have the talent to compete for four quarters of football and come out with a victory because they were better than the other team. Such is the way of a rebuild.
 

Texian

Hall of Fame
Maybe being too optimistic here, but I think this is a winnable game. This potentially sets up as a classic 'letdown' spot for the commanders - short week, on the road following a big road win against the league's best team. If we can limit the brutal errors that all of our young players are making at key times, and Pep's play calling doesn't go limp in the first half, this is a winnable game.
This does have all the makings for an upset. If I was in Vegas I would probably be taking the points on this one.
 

Texansballer74

The Marine
Maybe being too optimistic here, but I think this is a winnable game. This potentially sets up as a classic 'letdown' spot for the commanders - short week, on the road following a big road win against the league's best team. If we can limit the brutal errors that all of our young players are making at key times, and Pep's play calling doesn't go limp in the first half, this is a winnable game.
We had quite of few winnable games but they have found several ways to shoot them selves in the foot. They’ll repeat that trend tomorrow.
 

IDEXAN

Hall of Fame
Contributor's Club
OK so we can win one more game and that's it.
If we go to two wins we are still guaranteed to get the first or second overall but if we go to three wins we likely won't get a top ten pick, so it's f....ing meaningless and worse counter productive to win any more games this year.
 

thunderkyss

Just win baby!!!
Staff member
Contributor's Club
What’s the over/under on Eno Benjamin carries?

I honestly don’t think he will get any.
 

CloakNNNdagger

Hall of Fame
The Washington Commanders have declared the following players as inactive:
  • No. 37 CB Rachad Wildgoose
  • No. 51 David Mayo
  • No. 55 Cole Holcomb
  • No. 75 Chris Paul
 


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