Another Injured Colt...

Discussion in 'The National Football League' started by Dutchrudder, Oct 28, 2010.

  1. Dutchrudder

    Dutchrudder King of the Potato People

    Jan 25, 2010
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    Another blow to the injury riddled Colts team. During warm up stretches one of the Colt's most important practice players strained her back this week. Jessie 'J-wow' Harris pulled a muscle in her back, just to the right side of her tramp stamp. Jessie described it as 'the most painful boo-boo since her last waxing'. Team trainers said she was rushed to the locker room for a full checkup by doctors, but they don't anticipate her being back on the practice field until early next week and maybe longer if the trainers want to keep her under observation.

    Jessie was an integral part of the team's 'Possum Drill' in which she would line up on defense and run at Peyton Manning. She would then hit him as hard as her 82 pound body could just after Manning released the ball, in order to give him reps of flailing on the ground to encourage a penalty flag. Coach Jim Caldwell said she will be missed, but he is confident the team can replace her for a few days. "Jessie was our lightest player at 82 pounds, all the other girls are at least 95+." Caldwell continued, "You just don't send a 95 pound girl at your 100 million dollar QB during practice! That would be crazy... that's something Josh McDaniels would do!"

    The team plans on trying out cheerleaders from the local high school to fill in for the rest of the week, however Curtis Painter was unable to perform the drill citing off the record his concern over his 'crazyass wife' who will not be named. In a show of teamwork, many of the other Colt's teammates have volunteered to be a stand-in for Peyton's position during the tryouts. Defensive Tackle Daniel Muir was removed from the tryouts after one of the high schoolers bounced off his belly and twisted her ankle. Austin Collie assumed the role of 'fake Peyton Manning' for the rest of the tryouts in his place. After practice Collie said he was glad to help the team while injured and went on to say, 'it's really great, I haven't had girls this young jumping on me since I left Utah!' The tryouts are expected to finish today to give enough prep time before the Monday night game.

    A photographer catches Jessie's (pictured right) pain as she begins stretching:


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