okay, it's Monday folks, which is always a good night to get hammered out of your mind. and you'll need to be liquored up to get through the commentary of tonight's game. grab your favorite bottle of hard liquor and settle down. here's the criteria: - Every commercial starring Reggie Bush during the game warrants a shot. - Every commercial starring Deuce McAllister or Drew Brees gets 10 shots. - Pound a shot when the term "Madden curse" is used. If Kornheiser brings it up, make it two shots. - Speaking of Kornheiser, whenever he makes an analogy comparing a player on the field to a pop culture phenom, i.e. Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, or the like, drink a shot. - If you can tell Jaws has no idea who Kornheiser is comparing the player to, take a shot. - If ESPN shows a highlight package of Reggie Bush, and the highlight package consists of the same 3 plays we've seen over and over again, drink a shot. - If someone mentions the Texans passing on Bush, take a shot. This just might be the one that gets you wasted. - If Bush runs for more than 5 yards on a play, drink a shot for each replay. - If Katrina is mentioned, do a shot. - If someone says "There's still a lot of work to be done in New Orleans," bow your head in prayer for those poor people. And...do a shot. - Have a half-shot for every time Reggie Bush is mentioned when the Saints defense is on the field. - Same with Vince Young when the Titans defense is on the field. - Finish the bottle when Jaws snaps and punches Kornheiser in the face for an awful joke.