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defense names?

Ok, I don't think "Department of Defense" is really spot-on but if you must tick off the football gods with premature nicknames and logos then lets get the proper colors in there.

TEXANSDOD.jpg
 
Hervoyel said:
The football gods (little"g" there) do in fact exist and my being an atheist is not (despite appearances) a contradiction of that statement. The football gods are real and widely believed in. Do a search in Google for "The football gods" and you will return approximately 2,200,000 hits.

Many believe that the football gods are descended from the Olympians or possibly from some other ancient pantheon of beings. I do not believe that.

I personally believe that the football gods are composed of the ghosts of the "great ones" from footballs past and governed by the incarnation of "Fate". I believe that they roam the land in a well outfitted recreational vehicle that serves as a kind of tailgating "Flying Dutchman". I believe that they tailgate every day of the week (because every day of the week for them is Sunday) and I believe that in the afterlife their injuries are healed, their minds are clear, and they pay attention to everything associated with NFL football.

More than anything I believe that they get pissed off when people violate their rules which fall somewhere between the 10 Commandments and the Miller Beer Man-Laws in seriousness.

Naming a defense that's been kicking butt for two whole games is a violation of the rules. NO, last season does not count. It doesn't count because it was not recognized until after the fact. Consider it our defenses "formative years". Note that nobody ever throws out the 1984 Bears defense in a conversation.

Don't worry DB, John McClain can't get away with violating the football gods rules either and yes, FANS can name the defense as can sports writers and players. There are no rules regarding where the name comes from, only that it not be applied prematurely. John McClain won't "cherry pick" the name he likes and then make it stick. He's no more capable of naming them too soon than you and I are. The football gods will not permit it.
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To be honest, I deny the existence of football gods because they've NEVER done anything for this city.

Mike Renfro? 35-3? What did we do to inspire the wrath?! Build a dome on Ancient Native American burial grounds? Offend with baby blue colors? Perhaps it was Bud's rug? Maybe The Walrus is their love child with the ruler of Uranus? They live in denial of us, man! Tennessee gets a Superbowl?!! WTF?!

I can't take being smited without good reason, and they are mute on the subject. Silent. No prayer answered. Pointless.

They say God is dead when people no longer believe. Well, I refuse to let a bunch of high and mighty football gods have a say in things anymore. So, I merely refuse to believe they exist, so they don't. :D
 
Hervoyel said:
Ok, I don't think "Department of Defense" is really spot-on but if you must tick off the football gods with premature nicknames and logos then lets get the proper colors in there.

TEXANSDOD.jpg
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Sweet logo Herv. I like Raging Bulls or Bull Rush best. I also love the logo, but it's more of a visual.

Also, thanks for putting Laz in his place over at the Chron, on the Mcclain column comments.:whip:
 
I would have thought it was obvious. The football gods have held the city of Houston in contempt since the day we began playing football on green carpet indoors (at a stadium where you couldn't even setup a BBQ pit in the parking lot no less).

The football gods (along with the baseball gods who they sometimes associate with) "smote" us because we were the logical city to blame for the abomination known as Astroturf.

Notice how the basketball gods took no part in the punishment?
 
Perhaps you're on to something, Herv... :hmmm: or is that on something?

The Astros never won a post-season series until they moved out of the 'dome and away from the astroturf. They started winning when real grass was beneath their feet.

But explain the Cowboys then. They've always played on artificial turf, and they've been to more Superbowls than any other team.

We go 3-0, and maybe I'll start giving some credit to these 'football gods'. :shades:
 
This whole discussion of football gods reminds me of a quote:

""I contend we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours"

-- Stephen Roberts

Just sub "football gods" where you see god(s). :lol:
 
Double Barrel said:
Perhaps you're on to something, Herv... :hmmm: or is that on something?

The Astros never won a post-season series until they moved out of the 'dome and away from the astroturf. They started winning when real grass was beneath their feet.

But explain the Cowboys then. They've always played on artificial turf, and they've been to more Superbowls than any other team.

We go 3-0, and maybe I'll start giving some credit to these 'football gods'. :shades:
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That ones easy. Teams that followed the introduction of Astroturf were not punished by the football gods. They would have had to punish practically the entire league in order to make that stick and the football gods are not stupid. They know NFL football must continue and stay healthy.

They punished the guys who started it, not the guys who were led astray by them.
 
Hervoyel said:
Ok, I don't think "Department of Defense" is really spot-on but if you must tick off the football gods with premature nicknames and logos then lets get the proper colors in there.

TEXANSDOD.jpg
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great logo!!!!!!!

whomever said this logo does NOT work b/c we're not in Washington DC is kinda dumb. I bet he would have said about the oiler's "House of Pain", THIS IS DUMB, ITS A DOME, NOT A HOUSE :blah: :blah::blah:
 
TEXANS4MARIO said:
great logo!!!!!!!

whomever said this logo does NOT work b/c we're not in Washington DC is kinda dumb. I bet he would have said about the oiler's "House of Pain", THIS IS DUMB, ITS A DOME, NOT A HOUSE :blah: :blah::blah:
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The "dumb" guy who said it doesn't work because we aren't Washington D.C. (where the "Department of Defense" is actually located) happens to be me.

I'm also the guy who did that particular version of this logo so take that for what it's worth.

And I happened to like the name "House of Pain" by the way. it worked very well here. Department of Defense isn't that good of a fit. Sorry, I just don't see it.
 
Hervoyel said:
Ok, I don't think "Department of Defense" is really spot-on but if you must tick off the football gods with premature nicknames and logos then lets get the proper colors in there.

TEXANSDOD.jpg
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Ok, the colors are awesome, but I'm not crazy about the fence. . .Yes, I know, deFENCE!

Herv, thanks for playing along even though you don't like it. . .Question, won't your football gods be upset for you for participating in such an act....I mean, you are contributing!
 
Texans Pride said:
Herv, thanks for playing along even though you don't like it. . .Question, won't your football gods be upset for you for participating in such an act....I mean, you are contributing!
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They're kind of like Santa Claus with that whole "knows when you've been bad or good" thing so I understand nothing slips past them. I took a chance there with the football gods but I think they know what's truly in the heart of every fan and won't hold it against me.

If the Texans can hold the Colts down to some otherwise unexplainable number of yards or points then I think (and it's just a guess on my part) that the football gods will have given their nod of approval for the Texans defense to get a name. Where that name comes from is outside of the scope of this post but I think Double Barrel is on the right track about that. It can come from anywhere once the time is right and the fans are almost obligated to put their 2 cents in.
 
'Most sacked qb ever'

they'll have a video message and all like marino->favre when it happens, dave will cry a little but will wipe away his tears with his gloves and, in an emotional speech, say he could have done it without his teammates
 
After this past week, I will call them what I kept screaming when the Dolphins ran all over us....."HOLY CRAP!!!"

We will need to do much better against the Jags.
 
Tedc said:
After this past week, I will call them what I kept screaming when the Dolphins ran all over us....."HOLY CRAP!!!"

We will need to do much better against the Jags.
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The MB is an inspiration:

"The Vanilla Defense"

You can't name a defense until they consistently perform in a way that is scary to the other team and not your fanbase.
 
Travis Johnson seemed to have a Wizard of Oz thing going on the other day. Maybe we should call them the "Flying Monkeys Defense"

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Those look like Texans colors to me.
 
How about the "Can't stop the screen pass if their lives depended on it" defense.

Sorry, just venting.
 
I think we should just call them "Charmin" because they're so soft.

Here are the Texans in their goal line "6-roll-front Charmin formation"

charminformation6rollfront.jpg
 
since we like to let the offense dictate how they are defended we should name them the co-dependant curtain.
 
What defense?

In all fairness, they did get a couple of stops against the Jags but a few bad calls by the official didn't help.
 
I call them the Tourette's defense. The defense makes all Texans fans have Tourette's.:user:

Tourette's was once considered a rare and bizarre syndrome, most often associated with the exclamation of obscene words or socially inappropriate and derogatory remarks.
 
M Shadows said:
I call them the Tourette's defense. The defense makes all Texans fans have Tourette's.:user:

Tourette's was once considered a rare and bizarre syndrome, most often associated with the exclamation of obscene words or socially inappropriate and derogatory remarks.
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mother ****er, this **** ****ing sucks. These guys cant stop ****ing molasses in ****ing winter time. All these ****ers (with the exception of Ryans, Okoye and Robinson) should be ****ing cut, right ****ing now.. God D*** s** of a b****s
 
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