Chris Cooley

Need more evidence that Washington Redskins tight end Chris Cooley is a downright goofball? Consider the behind-the-scenes story involving a pill bottle in the huddle.

It seems that Cooley, quarterback Mark Brunell and tight end Christian Fauria were having lunch after a recent training camp practice. Fauria, especially tired after the hot workout, expressed his fatigue by saying: "I need some more nutrients."

Nutrients? What kind of football player would utter a sentence like that? Cooley and Brunell couldn't help but laugh. "We made fun of him at the dinner table," Cooley said.

The next day, during another of coach Joe Gibbs' hard-nosed practices, Cooley walked into the huddle and feigned exhaustion. Right on cue, Brunell produced a bottle of vitamins, wrapped in athletic tape and labeled with the word "nutrients" written in permanent marker.

"He pops out about three of them in his hand," Cooley said. "He said, 'Here, I've got some 'nutrients' for you, bro.' So we both took some 'nutrients."' Needless to say, there was laughter all around, all at Fauria's expense.

"You've got to have fun to be here," Cooley said. "You spend a lot of time around the guys, you've got to make it fun. I really try to, even on days I feel terrible, I really try to goof around and enjoy myself."

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Beginning in late October of 2005, Portis began wearing costumes to his press conferences and acting in character, to simultaneously deflect serious press questions regarding his touchdown slump, and to avoid the cliche interviews that plague professional sports coverage. Portis has stated that his primary motivation was to have fun. His entourage of characters consisted of:

The Mad Scientist
Southeast Jerome - His costume consisted of a black wig, a Lone Ranger mask, a black cape, gold teeth, and large, oversized yellow sunglasses. During the interview Portis (Jerome?) loses his composure numerous times, and begins to laugh uncontrollably (even knocking his glasses off of his head in the process).
Dr. I Don't Know
Sherriff Gonna Getcha - He appeared with a fake set of buckteeth, a black led zeppelin t-shirt, circular glasses with fake eyes, leather balls, and a mullet wig. The leather balls were incorporated into the persona to convey Portis' toughness.
Dolla Bill
Rev. Gonna Change
Kid Bro Sweets
Inspector 2-2
The Angel of Southeast Jerome
Coach Janky Spanky
Hot Stuff
Psychic Bum-Bum (during an interview on Headline News)
Coconut Jones
Sir Lend-me-a-hand


Southeast Jerome
Southeast Jerome is a fictional character created by Washington Redskins running back Clinton Portis. He is one of the many characters that Portis used for his media interviews during the 2005 NFL season. Southeast Jerome's get-up includes a black wig, a lone ranger mask, black cape, gold teeth, and yellow sunglasses. "The word" on Southeast Jerome was that he is "Going to the Big City. Doesn't know what he is going to see up in the big city so he's gotta get his face right."[1]

Southeast Jerome soon disappeared, and a number of characters came forward in the following weeks to comment on the disappearence. Portis, dressed up as Dr. I Don't Know, said that Jerome died in New York City after being held up in an illegal poker room while playing with Alex Rodriguez. Another character, Sheriff Gonna Getcha, said he was going to Tampa to question Ronde Barber along with a few other guys in regards to the disappearence of Southeast Jerome. Portis also dressed up as Dolla Bill, who claimed that Jerome used to work for him, and that he was involved in the manhunt for Jerome's killer as well. In December, Portis dressed up as Inspector 2-2, who said he was brought in to question Tiki Barber and some of the other New York Giants players about Jerome's disappearence.

Apparently, it was confirmed that Southeast Jerome died on October 30, 2005, and Portis later gave an interview as the Angel of Southeast Jerome on December 29, 2005. The angel claimed that Jerome is up in heaven with a bunch of his homies

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Christy, the Redskins representative in Maxim cheerleader spreads the past two seasons, isn’t on the FedEx sidelines this year. Neither is Frankie, a cheer rookie who, to judge by the photo that was briefly on the team’s Web site, had what it takes to make it in the bigs. Both were asked to turn in their pompoms over the summer, reportedly for extracurricular associations with beloved Redskin Chris Cooley.

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LCROD said:

The Redskins cheerleaders also liked him alot. Enough to lose to get removed from the team:



http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/cheap/2005/cheap1209.html

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