Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke)

Stemp · Sep 12, 2012

Jerry's son-in-law Shy Anderson, who was seen cleaning Jones' glasses, has come up with a new product that will be for sale soon on DallasCowboys.com. The product: "Jerry Wipes."

This is not a joke. (Although it begs for a few.) It is not an Onion Sports article. Anderson came up with the idea to design and order eyeglass-cleaning cloths with the words "Jerry Wipes" printed on them, according to the Dallas Morning News.

"They can also be used for spontaneous shoe shining, if necessary," Anderson cracked. "It started out as a joke, but let's see how far we can take it."

There are so many different ways this could not end well.

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap1000000061069/article/jerry-jones-dallas-cowboys-introducing-jerry-wipes

At first, I thought it was something that would be sold with Depends, but oh well.

:wadepalm:

gtexan02 · Sep 12, 2012

Make sure you bring your Jerry Wipes before you enter the giant toilet bowl

Playoffs · Sep 12, 2012

Testimonials--

I've been wiping my a$$ with Jerruh for years! -- Eli Manning

chicagotexan2 · Sep 12, 2012

I think it is brilliant. Just sell these in the mens room next to the $1 Polo and $1 Drakkar to 'clean up' after you get yourself some

GLORY HOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ChampionTexan · Sep 12, 2012

gwallaia · Sep 12, 2012

I bet his son-in-law does more than just wipe his glasses.

StarStruck · Sep 12, 2012

Cool. I wonder if Albertson's will stock them or only the pro shop. I rely on good old Albertson's for my BBQ sauce, lighter fluid, charcoal, plasticware and hand sanitizer towelettes. Heard that they are discontinuing the paper towels which weren't that spectacular with the stars down each side, but they were cheap.

TexanSam · Sep 12, 2012

StarStruck said:
Cool. I wonder if Albertson's will stock them or only the pro shop. I rely on good old Albertson's for my BBQ sauce, lighter fluid, charcoal, plasticware and hand sanitizer towelettes. Heard that they are discontinuing the paper towels which weren't that spectacular with the stars down each side, but they were cheap.

You serious?

HoustonFrog · Sep 13, 2012

I give the guy credit for taking a joke seen everywhere and running with it. People will buy them.

StarStruck · Sep 13, 2012

HoustonFrog said:
I give the guy credit for taking a joke seen everywhere and running with it. People will buy them.

I will. I read that the proceeds will be going to Salvation Army.

Dread-Head · Sep 13, 2012

Now if they sold toilet paper with Jerry's face on it.

Stemp · Sep 13, 2012

Dread-Head said:
Now if they sold toilet paper with Jerry's face on it.

You'd think it was used toilet paper.

Dread-Head · Sep 13, 2012

Stemp said:
You'd think it was used toilet paper.

I didn't know Lizzards USED Toilet paper!

Say Watt · Sep 13, 2012

This thread is awesome. Please, keep the jokes coming. I have nothing funny to add, but I really ROFL-ing right now!!

GP · Sep 13, 2012

Is it pre-moistened with the tears of Cowboys fans?

:crying:

Beer and Metal · Sep 13, 2012

So?

I always wipe my Jerry after I take a Jones. It's kinda cool they make a specific product for that now.

chicagotexan2 · Sep 13, 2012

Another great innovative product from the cowboys like Nate newtons trunk-o-weed and micHael Irvin's goal line of coke.

FirstTexansFan · Sep 16, 2012

Edited for our enjoyment...

HJam72 · Sep 16, 2012

Those are perfect for when I've been drinking Dr. Pepper.

Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke)

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