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Why dont We Just Hire Some Guys From This Board To Be Our Coaches!
- Thread starter TexansR#1
- Start date
Hervoyel
BUENO!
That's an excellent suggestion and I want each and every one of you to know that under the new "Hervoyel" regime the Texans are going to play aggressive on both sides of the ball and I expect no problems whatsoever handling the additional GM duties.
I've got some announcements to make by the way so I'd like to go ahead and do that here during my hiring press conference.
First of all I've spoken with the GM of the Kansas City Chiefs and they've agreed to take Patrick Buchanon off of our hands so long as we include Travis Johnson in the deal. In return we're getting Derrick Johnson and a 3rd in next years draft.
We're starting Jerry DeLoach the rest of the season at TJ's spot and "Petey" Faggins is going to start for us the rest of the year on P-Burnts side. We'll address his eventual replacement in free agency.
DJ plugs right into Kailee Wongs spot on the inside. Yes I expect him to have some growing pains changing teams in the middle of the season. No I don't think anything he does can look bad when held up against what our linebackers have been giving us.
David Carr's my quarterback so everyone talking about drafting Leinart can settle down. We're going to draft a LT in the first next year. In the meantime this team is going to have a very limited passing game. I know it's going to be no fun to watch but the previous regime left me no choice. We can't protect him and he has no idea what a reasonable amount of time to hold the ball is. We're going to have to address this during the mini camps and training camp. Until then he's not going to be throwing anything longer than about twenty yards and he won't be dropping back more than three steps.
There will be more information on Monday morning after we get beat by the Colts. Yes I said we're going to get beaten by the Colts. That shouldn't come as any surprise to you people. Who in their right mind could possible expect a win against the only undefeated team in the NFL on the day after the owner hands over the team to a fan? I don't even have my coaching staff in place yet!
Speaking of which I need to check and see about something. Porky? You ready to be my defense coordinator? c'mon man, I need your help here and I need Vinny to coach the offense. You guys get back to me as soon as you can. Otherwise I'm going to look real stupid on the sideline tomorrow by myself.
I've got some announcements to make by the way so I'd like to go ahead and do that here during my hiring press conference.
First of all I've spoken with the GM of the Kansas City Chiefs and they've agreed to take Patrick Buchanon off of our hands so long as we include Travis Johnson in the deal. In return we're getting Derrick Johnson and a 3rd in next years draft.
We're starting Jerry DeLoach the rest of the season at TJ's spot and "Petey" Faggins is going to start for us the rest of the year on P-Burnts side. We'll address his eventual replacement in free agency.
DJ plugs right into Kailee Wongs spot on the inside. Yes I expect him to have some growing pains changing teams in the middle of the season. No I don't think anything he does can look bad when held up against what our linebackers have been giving us.
David Carr's my quarterback so everyone talking about drafting Leinart can settle down. We're going to draft a LT in the first next year. In the meantime this team is going to have a very limited passing game. I know it's going to be no fun to watch but the previous regime left me no choice. We can't protect him and he has no idea what a reasonable amount of time to hold the ball is. We're going to have to address this during the mini camps and training camp. Until then he's not going to be throwing anything longer than about twenty yards and he won't be dropping back more than three steps.
There will be more information on Monday morning after we get beat by the Colts. Yes I said we're going to get beaten by the Colts. That shouldn't come as any surprise to you people. Who in their right mind could possible expect a win against the only undefeated team in the NFL on the day after the owner hands over the team to a fan? I don't even have my coaching staff in place yet!
Speaking of which I need to check and see about something. Porky? You ready to be my defense coordinator? c'mon man, I need your help here and I need Vinny to coach the offense. You guys get back to me as soon as you can. Otherwise I'm going to look real stupid on the sideline tomorrow by myself.
touttail
Rookie
Herv,
You are doing an excellent job my friend.
Just disagree with you on two things:
1--Petey is just as bad if not worse than PBuch. Petey gets burnt much too often. DBennett ate his lunch twice right in front of us during the Titan game.
2--You gotta pass or they will continue to line up a 8 man front like Seattle did and you can't run nor pass.
I was a defensive lineman for 6 years in school, so I would like to apply for the DLine coaching job!
bobby 119C
You are doing an excellent job my friend.
Just disagree with you on two things:
1--Petey is just as bad if not worse than PBuch. Petey gets burnt much too often. DBennett ate his lunch twice right in front of us during the Titan game.
2--You gotta pass or they will continue to line up a 8 man front like Seattle did and you can't run nor pass.
I was a defensive lineman for 6 years in school, so I would like to apply for the DLine coaching job!
bobby 119C
Porky
Hall of Fame
Vinny said:
You're a bit bigger than me, so it might be the opposite. But, I do have something extra special in my game plan. I call it the 34D Blitz. I have seven guys drop into coverage, and rush four cheerleaders. Payton will actually WANT to get sacked. As I see it, that is our only hope. I appreciate the offer Herv, and gladly accept. I will work for free as long as I don't have to bunk with Vinny on road trips.
YoungTexanFan
All Pro
the drafting should be done by a small group of people, extremely devoted to the draft. i would suggest: beerlover, NFLdraft, me...YoungTexanFan, infantryrock, and hervoyle.
we have an odd number of people in this group to help on tie breakers.
we have an odd number of people in this group to help on tie breakers.
YoungTexanFan
All Pro
Texas said:
I second that!
Vinny for GM!!!
I feel like I just won a 
Hervoyel
BUENO!
touttail said:
I see your point there touttail but honestly, Petey's all we have. We're going to get burned over there all year long and I don't think anyone here should be counting on seeing improvement this season. Sure in that respect I'll be doing no better than the current coaching staff. I admit that. I won't be lying to anyone about it though and two years from now if we haven't improved I'll voluntarily allow myself to be tarred and feathered before you run me out of town.
Same thing goes with the passing game. It's just not going to get better with the "parts" we have on hand and my new coaches don't have enough time to get things completely turned around this year. At best you're liable to see some passing in the last quarter of the season but that's probably going to be it. Mostly I just want to keep Carr upright the rest of the season. I'll worry about the rest of it when I get there.
Wharton
Rookie
Bubbajwp said:
Can I be the o-line coach????
When I was in high school, the entire o-line ran the goal posts when one player missed his block. Let me tell ya, it worked wonders!!
We always had the best offensive line.
Considering the number of blocks these guys are missing, they will either become the best, or die of heat exhaustion! Either way, the problem will be solved!
Just appoint me in charge of stadium music. I promise you will rock! 
