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Team Pollardized

Pollardized

Division Champ
After giving the subject much thought, I have decided to back the one person whom I know for sure would coach the Texans the way I see fit ---- ME. I would bring a new level of toughness to the team.

I would not stand for OLE tackles on defense any longer. Wrap the man up and take him to the ground. We would practice in pads every day, proper tackling technique would be essential to getting on the field. Coverage would be just that - coverage. No more standing 20 yards off your man while he runs up and down the field all game. If you can't cover, you are not a DB on my team. Safeties better be able to do what they are supposed to do: Strong Safety should SUPPORT the CB's (who now would know how to cover and tackle), stop the run and knock the piss out of people. D linemen better be able to get off the block and pressure the QB. If you can't get off the block, I can find guys who are hungry that can. The most important aspect of play I want to see from my team as coach is aggresiveness; no more nice soft teams in Texan uniforms.

On offense I would have big strong linemen to block the candy asses who weren't tough enough to play on my team. I want guys who look like they would eat you if possible. Linemen better be ready to protect their QB at all costs, and make huge holes for the RB. My offense would be based on running the ball. Run, run, run. When we get tired of running, we run some more. Oh, then when you bring 8 in the box consistently to stop my run, I will have a QB who can audible and burn your ass in coverage. My QB will not make boneheaded throws once a game because he looks lost. He will be a student of the game, someone who studies to be the best at his profession.

Special teams would be a very interesting place to play on my team. You better be able to tackle, force piss to run uncontrollably down legs when necessary, consistently kick the ball through the upright, and punt more than 30 yards at a time.

Accountability is the key to my coaching philosophy. Everyone is accountable and will perform highly or be replaced.

These are my coaching principles. I hope Mr. McNair will allow me the opportunity to present them this off season in my official interview.
 
You got my vote! I will be your GM. I promise to go the the DM school of raping the competition. I will only draft future HOF'ers. I will sign all top FA's to reasonable contracts and cut them if they don't perform to your standards.

Not only that, I will make sure that McNair will never ask you to use a script or "be nice".
 
You got my vote! I will be your GM. I promise to go the the DM school of raping the competition. I will only draft future HOF'ers. I will sign all top FA's to reasonable contracts and cut them if they don't perform to your standards.

Not only that, I will make sure that McNair will never ask you to use a script or "be nice".

I think its time for people to step off DM's ________________ and realize the Rockets experiment has failed.




feel free to madlib
 
I need coaches for my staff. Give me your ideas and why I should hire you...

I can coach the D.

I know how to teach a team to knock the piss out of people.
Imagine a whole team of piss knockers...We will have to hire guys to clean up before the offense comes out though...piss makes the field slippery.

I also understand how to change tactics when the ones in use are no longer working.

Plus anyone who is playing half assed gets the piss knocked out of them.

My name is not Bush...or any type of plant.

How are those qualifications??
 
I can coach the D.

I know how to teach a team to knock the piss out of people.
Imagine a whole team of piss knockers...We will have to hire guys to clean up before the offense comes out though...piss makes the field slippery.

I also understand how to change tactics when the ones in use are no longer working.

Plus anyone who is playing half assed gets the piss knocked out of them.

My name is not Bush...or any type of plant.

How are those qualifications??

Good interview T. You're hired. Let's find some other coaches/coordinators now!
 
Good interview T. You're hired. Let's find some other coaches/coordinators now!

I am going to pursue TB for special teams. He is used to operating in danger zones. He knows the value of a good kicker, and how to avoid the gunners. And, he knows how to adjust his game plan for the missed rides.


Got my eye on an OL coach, but don't know if he is willing to interview for the job.
 
Better watch out cause Tebow is gonna have a big adventure on your fantasy team (nfl.com)

Well b0ng, looks like Tebow's big adventure came up a little short.

Great head to head week though!!!!! Hillis is a beast for you. I'm so glad I picked Arian Foster in the 2nd round of both my leagues!!!!!
 
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