Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) - Houston Texans Message Board & Forum

**Stemp** · 09-12-2012

Quote:

Jerry's son-in-law Shy Anderson, who was seen cleaning Jones' glasses, has come up with a new product that will be for sale soon on DallasCowboys.com. The product: "Jerry Wipes."

This is not a joke. (Although it begs for a few.) It is not an Onion Sports article. Anderson came up with the idea to design and order eyeglass-cleaning cloths with the words "Jerry Wipes" printed on them, according to the Dallas Morning News.

"They can also be used for spontaneous shoe shining, if necessary," Anderson cracked. "It started out as a joke, but let's see how far we can take it."

There are so many different ways this could not end well.

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap100...ng-jerry-wipes

At first, I thought it was something that would be sold with Depends, but oh well.

**gtexan02** · 09-12-2012

Make sure you bring your Jerry Wipes before you enter the giant toilet bowl

**Playoffs** · 09-12-2012

Testimonials--

I've been wiping my a$$ with Jerruh for years! -- Eli Manning

chicagotexan2 · 09-12-2012

I think it is brilliant. Just sell these in the mens room next to the $1 Polo and $1 Drakkar to 'clean up' after you get yourself some

GLORY HOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**ChampionTexan** · 09-12-2012

**gwallaia** · 09-12-2012

I bet his son-in-law does more than just wipe his glasses.

**StarStruck** · 09-12-2012

Cool. I wonder if Albertson's will stock them or only the pro shop. I rely on good old Albertson's for my BBQ sauce, lighter fluid, charcoal, plasticware and hand sanitizer towelettes. Heard that they are discontinuing the paper towels which weren't that spectacular with the stars down each side, but they were cheap.

TexanSam · 09-12-2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by StarStruck

Cool. I wonder if Albertson's will stock them or only the pro shop. I rely on good old Albertson's for my BBQ sauce, lighter fluid, charcoal, plasticware and hand sanitizer towelettes. Heard that they are discontinuing the paper towels which weren't that spectacular with the stars down each side, but they were cheap.

You serious?

**HoustonFrog** · 09-13-2012

I give the guy credit for taking a joke seen everywhere and running with it. People will buy them.

**StarStruck** · 09-13-2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by HoustonFrog

I give the guy credit for taking a joke seen everywhere and running with it. People will buy them.

I will. I read that the proceeds will be going to Salvation Army.

Dread-Head · 09-13-2012

Now if they sold toilet paper with Jerry's face on it.

**Stemp** · 09-13-2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dread-Head

Now if they sold toilet paper with Jerry's face on it.

You'd think it was used toilet paper.

Dread-Head · 09-13-2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stemp

You'd think it was used toilet paper.

I didn't know Lizzards USED Toilet paper!

**Say Watt** · 09-13-2012

This thread is awesome. Please, keep the jokes coming. I have nothing funny to add, but I really ROFL-ing right now!!

GP · 09-13-2012

Is it pre-moistened with the tears of Cowboys fans?

Beer and Metal · 09-13-2012

So?

I always wipe my Jerry after I take a Jones. It's kinda cool they make a specific product for that now.

chicagotexan2 · 09-13-2012

Another great innovative product from the cowboys like Nate newtons trunk-o-weed and micHael Irvin's goal line of coke.

FirstTexansFan · 09-16-2012

Edited for our enjoyment...

HJam72 · 09-16-2012

Those are perfect for when I've been drinking Dr. Pepper.

09-12-2012	#2
gtexan02 Working? Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Boston Age: 29 Posts: 15,334 Rep Power: 34917	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) Make sure you bring your Jerry Wipes before you enter the giant toilet bowl __________________ Adios until next season. See you then

09-12-2012	#3
Playoffs Subscribed Contributor Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 7,299 Rep Power: 52089	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) Testimonials-- I've been wiping my a$$ with Jerruh for years! -- Eli Manning

09-12-2012	#4
chicagotexan2 IDBLDogDareU Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Somewhere most interesting Posts: 6,403 Rep Power: 36063	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) I think it is brilliant. Just sell these in the mens room next to the $1 Polo and $1 Drakkar to 'clean up' after you get yourself some GLORY HOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! __________________ OBL is D.O.A. Thank you Navy SEALS.

09-12-2012	#5
ChampionTexan Site Contributor Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 4,337 Rep Power: 25874	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) __________________ Please don't feed the trolls.

09-12-2012	#6
gwallaia Moderator Join Date: Apr 2004 Age: 46 Posts: 6,760 Rep Power: 22986	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) I bet his son-in-law does more than just wipe his glasses. __________________ It is impossible to keep your eyes open when you sneeze.

09-12-2012	#7
StarStruck Site Contributor Join Date: May 2004 Location: Missouri City, Texas Age: 65 Posts: 4,154 Rep Power: 9236	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) Cool. I wonder if Albertson's will stock them or only the pro shop. I rely on good old Albertson's for my BBQ sauce, lighter fluid, charcoal, plasticware and hand sanitizer towelettes. Heard that they are discontinuing the paper towels which weren't that spectacular with the stars down each side, but they were cheap.

09-13-2012	#9
HoustonFrog Chitown Frog Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Chicago Age: 43 Posts: 12,221 Rep Power: 19526	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) I give the guy credit for taking a joke seen everywhere and running with it. People will buy them. __________________ Desperation is a stinky cologne. -Super Troopers

09-13-2012	#11
Dread-Head Hall of Fame Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Houston Texas baby! Age: 43 Posts: 12,728 Rep Power: 42573	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) Now if they sold toilet paper with Jerry's face on it. __________________ Why attack a man for his race or religion when there are so many other PERFECTLY good reasons? Dread-Head. Texan from DAY ONE & PROUD Honorary Blue Crew member..."Damn it Bill!"

09-13-2012	#14
Say Watt Site Contributor Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 6,173 Rep Power: 12697	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) This thread is awesome. Please, keep the jokes coming. I have nothing funny to add, but I really ROFL-ing right now!!

09-13-2012	#15
GP Go Texans! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: TEXAS! Posts: 17,747 Rep Power: 50138	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) Is it pre-moistened with the tears of Cowboys fans? __________________

09-13-2012	#16
Beer and Metal Hall of Fame Join Date: May 2005 Age: 46 Posts: 1,422 Rep Power: 9096	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) So? I always wipe my Jerry after I take a Jones. It's kinda cool they make a specific product for that now. __________________ If God is throwing dice, and Einstein doesn't mind the chance, we'll navigate the seas of the sun.

09-16-2012	#18
FirstTexansFan The Unknown Fan Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: New Braunfels, Tx. Age: 54 Posts: 2,160 Rep Power: 7781	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) Edited for our enjoyment... __________________ Nawzer's #1 Fan, Because "Genius" must be recognized! :)

09-16-2012	#19
HJam72 Hall of Fame Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Over here. Age: 40 Posts: 10,473 Rep Power: 18004	Re: Cowboys to sell "Jerry wipes" (no joke) Those are perfect for when I've been drinking Dr. Pepper. __________________

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