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Old 09-29-2010   #1
Texans_Chick
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Default Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

Latest blog post:

Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

In which I discuss how out of the Kubiak years as coach, the Texans have started the first three games of the season the worst in defensive efficiency THREE times. 31st once. One year they were just mediocre.

I use Monty Python's Holy Grail to illustrate this point so Texan fans have something to prevent total depression. I am running out of rhetorical devices for writing bummer news in entertaining ways.
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Old 09-29-2010   #2
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

Nothing about the opposing QB's taunting us in a silly French accent?
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Old 09-29-2010   #3
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

Perhaps Pierre Garcon?
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Old 09-29-2010   #4
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

I fart in the general direction of the Texans Secondary!

Do we really like, REALLY overrate the players on our team's or something? I mean it seems like we should have a pretty good defense that plays consistent ball by now.
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Old 09-29-2010   #5
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

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Perhaps Pierre Garcon?
Oui.
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Old 09-29-2010   #6
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

"We need another pass rusher to pressure the QB!"

"No thank you! We've already got one! He's verrrry nice!"
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Old 09-29-2010   #7
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

Perhaps the Texan defenders could all yell "Ni! Ni!"
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Old 09-29-2010   #8
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

Stephanie, the only thing I didn't see you mention was the big passing play(s) that we tend to give up each game. Maybe you did and I just missed it.

Anyways, I think that in some of the games, we have been ok overall defensively but one or two players on a given play will make a mistake and allow a huge chunk of yardage to be gained by the offense.

Add that to the fact that we haven't been able to make many big plays defensively and it just compounds our mistakes.

The NO defense last year was not what many would define as "stout"...But their ability to get take aways and make big plays is what made them formiddable...

I wouldn't mind the coverage mistakes, the big plays given up and the 400+ yard passing games if we could cause more turnovers. Texans' defense is still a defense in search of an identity.
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Old 09-29-2010   #9
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

Personally I don't care what the stats say. Our defense is not as bad as they are made out to be.

We have gone against Manning, McNab, and Romo the first 3 weeks. And this is a young secondary, a rookie corner and a second year starter. You have to expect some lumps.

Throw in the fact that no one seems to be able to run against us all they can do is pass.

I think as Texan fans (I include myself in this statement) the last 8 years has conditioned our fan base to do nothing but *****, piss, and moan. For God's sake we are 2-1. If we go to Oakland and play like the Texans and not the Raiders we open the season 3-1.

C'mon TC, you are better than just looking at stats and talking to people who want to micro analyze everything. You are pulling a McClain and I know you are better than that. Put the stat sheet down and watch the game. Watch how the first two games as our defense came out and punched people in the mouth. They were hittin and hittin hard.

Everybody in this room should of known we were going to be in for a long day against Dallas. We pounded and played physical the first two games and even had to go to overtime. Dallas was coming in winless. So combine that with one tuckered out team with the opposing team desperate for a win and you get Sunday's results. And Dallas is a good team (I hate Dallas by the way) along with the Skins and Colts. Now if we lose to Oakland just erase what I said.

And sacks? Lets get Cush back and we should see more production. Its not that the front 4 aren't getting pressure its the QB taking a 3 step drop and finding his guy open in the flat. We can't cover the short pass.

So in short, I don't think the D is anywhere as bad as people make it out to be. Just my two cents.
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Old 09-29-2010   #10
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

And at this moment, the author suffered a fatal heart attack.
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Old 09-29-2010   #11
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

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Oui.
Faire me la bouche, *****!
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Old 09-29-2010   #12
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

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Faire me la bouche, *****!
*hurls cow at Bill*
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Old 09-30-2010   #13
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

The Texans Secondary..."It's just a flesh wound."
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Old 09-30-2010   #14
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

I think our defense is enjoying a little too much peril.

"Couldn't I have just a little peril?" Sir Galahad the Pure
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Old 09-30-2010   #15
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

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Originally Posted by TimeKiller View Post
I fart in the general direction of the Texans Secondary!
It would probably go for 20 yards and a first down.
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Old 09-30-2010   #16
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

I love it...monty python and the Texans...freaking awesome.
I wonder if Cushing will be the rabbit that rips everyone up?
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Old 09-30-2010   #17
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

Eric Idle: Bring out your dead!
Texans Defense: I'm not dead yet!


I could have figured you for a Python fan, TC. The humor in your writing style gives it away. You have an eye for the absurd.
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Old 09-30-2010   #18
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Default Re: Monty Python and the Holy Grail of Texans Defense

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I could have figured you for a Python fan, TC. The humor in your writing style gives it away. You have an eye for the absurd.
She hangs out with us, what do you expect?
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