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Old 09-24-2010   #1
Hookem Horns
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Default Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

Let's start a thread as to why or how the Texans will lose to the Cowboys. We need to offset the media hype (just in case any of our players are buying into it).

OK here I go ...

Romo will have one of his hot weeks and our 31st ranked pass defense will not be able to stop him. He will also not have any pressure because Mario is a wuss.

Schaub will be sacked 10 times because Duane Brown couldn't lay off of the "supplements". Arian Foster won't be able to run against the great front 7 of Dallas and Slaton is due to put a couple on the ground. Also AJ will be hampered by his ankle and will not be effective.

However the biggest factor will be the intimidation factor. The Texans players and staff will have to be facing on the opposite side line ...



THIS! ....



^^ credit to gtexan02
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Old 09-24-2010   #2
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hookem Horns View Post
Let's start a thread as to why or how the Texans will lose to the Cowboys. We need to offset the media hype (just in case any of our players are buying into it).

OK here I go ...

Romo will have one of his hot weeks and our 31st ranked pass defense will not be able to stop him. He will also not have any pressure because Mario is a wuss.

Schaub will be sacked 10 times because Duane Brown couldn't lay off of the "supplements". Arian Foster won't be able to run against the great front 7 of Dallas and Slaton is due to put a couple on the ground. Also AJ will be hampered by his ankle and will not be effective.

However the biggest factor will be the intimidation factor. The Texans players and staff will have to be facing on the opposite side line ...



THIS! ....



^^ credit to gtexan02
Negative rep to you and Gtexan for that!!
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Old 09-24-2010   #3
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

Texans wont win cause we have to many white players.

And Mario is a slouch.
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Old 09-24-2010   #4
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

Texans lose as in a landmark decision Jerra buys his way onto the field to be a ref through the commish and is the ump for the game.

This causes multiple calls that should have been on the cowtricks to be overlooked.

Also, Tod McShay (spelling) who erroniously stated earlier this week on ESPN when talking about Bama defensive players who went to the NFL listed Kareem Jackson to be starting for the Titans(.....WOW! came very close to breaking my TV) is named booth review ref for the game and calls back a INT for TD by Jackson as he is playing for the wrong team in McShay's mind.

Despite Romo's 5 for 55 passing show for -25 yards and 10 pics the cowtricks win a defensive toilet bowl 5-3 mirroring the score of that nights baseball game on ESPN.







Sorry....this is the best I can come up with while trying not to give the 'tricks credit....
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Old 09-24-2010   #5
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by Hookem Horns View Post
Romo will have one of his hot weeks and our 31st ranked pass defense will not be able to stop him. He will also not have any pressure because Mario is a wuss.
Seriously, man...does this really need to be said?


Everyone knows Mario sucks. I mean, seriously, we passed on a Super Bowl winner for that guy.


As a Texans fan I demand someone refund me for spending my hard-earned money on a #90 jersey. This guy stinks...
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Old 09-24-2010   #6
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Texans wont win cause we have to many white players.
LOL, we do have too many white receivers. .. Not that there is anything wrong with that.
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Old 09-24-2010   #7
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Not that there is anything wrong with that.

(Queue Seinfeld bass line and Kramer busting in the room pre-bout of racism)
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Old 09-24-2010   #8
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Old 09-24-2010   #9
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by Super Mario View Post
Texans wont win cause we have to many white players.

And Mario is a slouch.
Our honky to African ratio is a little out of wack, isn't it..?
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Old 09-24-2010   #10
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

Steve Slaton fumbles while running the kickoff out of bounds on the one yard line and Dallas scores. Dan Orslovsky throws INT that is returned for TD after Matt Schaub is knocked from the game for Texans first series. Rashad Butler shaking his head on the bench saying "why didn't someone tell me this Ware dude is fast?"

Matt # 2 enters the game in 2nd half and raggedly, slowly pulls the team together. Arian Foster pounds for two TDs tying the game. Fourth quarter, Andre races deep into the left corner of the end zone and leaps high, turns his head slowly and whispers "Got ya!" to the CB and both safeties as they fall into a heap. In the other corner of the end zone, Walter smiles sheepishly and shows the ball to the crowd and does his famous "white boy can dance" routine. Camera swings to watch JJ leaping into the stands to ask momma "what do winners get for supper?"

One Bad Boy says three down, three to go to be 6 and 0.

Sorry Hook'em. This team ain't losing Sunday.
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Old 09-24-2010   #11
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by Hookem Horns View Post
LOL, we do have too many white receivers. .. Not that there is anything wrong with that.
Yep! AJ is so white he makes me look dark!! Besides, he's like Mario, just a WUSS!! He don't talk no trash neider, so them cowpies are gonna smack him all over da field!!! Thank I'll take my ONE and only numbered red jersey #80 and pull a JoeTexan!! Burn that sucka at the tailgate! After all, AJ ain't no BULLY so how the hell can we beat a team that ain't nutin but bully's and trash talkers??!
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Old 09-24-2010   #12
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

Knock, knock
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Old 09-24-2010   #13
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by HTown2ATX View Post
Texans lose as in a landmark decision Jerra buys his way onto the field to be a ref through the commish and is the ump for the game.
<snicker>

I heard the head ref's brother just happens to be a plastic surgeon in Dallas. Just sayin'.
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Old 09-24-2010   #14
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

THIS is the Cowboy's Super Bowl.

They're going to play as mean as a mother possum. They're 0-2 and I think only 5 teams in history have started 0-3 and gotten to the playoffs.

The Cowboys are a very, very talented team that's just been shooting itself in the foot. IF they can get their heads straight for this game, then it could be trouble. Our secondary and defense has given up over 400 yards a game in the first two games and Romo is going to eat us for breakfast unless we're able to get some pressure on him. We got pressure on him in the preseason but that was with two second stringers on the line. That o-line is back and has a game of work under its belt.

The Cowboys also have three very talented running backs and if Jason Garrett gets out of their way, they would test our defense in ways it hasn't been tested, yet.

In the preseason, we were able to run almost at will on the Cowboys with Foster and Johnson. Foster was our first ever 100 yard rusher in the preseason. But they didn't have Brooking and they hadn't really game planned for us. We don't have DB and that's going to bring our line down and Ratliff will expose our weakness at C.

And when we try to pass, Demarcus Ware will school Butler and Wade Phillips is going to dial up a bunch of exotic blitzes that will cause our o-line (which had problems picking up the Redskin blitzes) to crumble and Schaub will be knocked around even worse than he was in Washington.

That's all the negative I can come up with and I don't believe much of it at all.

So far, the team that we bullied in the preseason is exactly the same team that's played the first two games of the season. I think our D is going to get tons of pressure on Romo and he's going to make mistakes. I think Foster is going to have a big game and that's going to slow down the Cowboy blitz and that's going to set up Schaub and AJ.

I think we're going to see something similar to what we saw against the Colts except I don't think the Cowboy offense is as potent.
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Old 09-24-2010   #15
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by Hookem Horns View Post
THIS! ....



^^ credit to gtexan02
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Old 09-24-2010   #16
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by HOU-TEX View Post
Knock, knock
I'll play...



Who's there?
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Old 09-24-2010   #17
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by HOU-TEX View Post
Knock, knock
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I'll play...



Who's there?
Owen
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Old 09-24-2010   #18
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Owen
This sure is getting a lot of play today...


Owen who?
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Old 09-24-2010   #19
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by HOU-TEX View Post
Knock, knock
Quote:
Originally Posted by JB View Post
I'll play...



Who's there?
Quote:
Originally Posted by HOU-TEX View Post
Owen
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Originally Posted by JB View Post
This sure is getting a lot of play today...


Owen who?
Owen three Cowgirl bitches!

Har, har
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Old 09-24-2010   #20
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Default Re: Why The Texans Will Lose to the Cowboys

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Originally Posted by HOU-TEX View Post
Owen

Is this the one they did on 610 this morning on the simul cast with Dallas?..
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