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Old 11-02-2009   #1
Dan B.
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Default Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Kissing Suzy Kolbert is IMO the funniest sports blog out there. Their impersonations of JJ and Wade Phillips are epic. They decided to feature the Texans today. This link leads to a fantasy conversation that isn't exactly G rated, but is awesome nonetheless. Apparently OD read up on mythology and has decided that he, Matt, Slaton, and AJ comprise the four headed beast that is the Chimera. For those that don't already know a Chimera has four heads -- a goat, dragon, and lion spring from it's neck, and the tail is a serpent.



OD wishes to be known as "snake d**k." He likes this because the snake is "sneaky dangerous, like me. No expects a monster to have a snake head around back. Plus, it’s kinda phallic. I could be snake d**k. Like, when other tight ends catch passes, it’s COOOOOLLLLLLEEEEYYYYYY or HEEEEEEAAAAAPPPPPPP or HHHHEEEEEAAAAAATTTTTHHHHHH. For me, Houston fans would go SSSSSNNNNNNAAAAAKKKKKKEEEEEE (you get the picture)."

Slaton and Matt have a little row over who gets to be the lion and who is the goat. Matt maintains he is the lion because "lions don't get benched." Slaton gets a bit upset over this, as one can imagine he would with his fragile ego. AJ, always the peacemaker, agrees to be the goat and deems Steve the lion and Matt the dragon. Why?

"CAUSE I’S THE GREATEST OF ALL TIMES, LITTLE ****** LION. Go get your lionnesses to do your hunting for you, bench b*tch! BBBAAA-AAAAAA-AAAHHHHHH! G.O.A.T.!"
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Old 11-02-2009   #2
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team



Now we know why Schaub randomly throws passes 30 feet away from his target. This dudes got the crazy eyes!
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Old 11-02-2009   #3
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Just in case some missed the joke, G.O.A.T. = Greatest Of All Time(s). Andre is most definitely our G.O.A.T.
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Old 11-02-2009   #4
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Quote:
Originally Posted by Goatcheese View Post


Now we know why Schaub randomly throws passes 30 feet away from his target. This dudes got the crazy eyes!
I liked the comment that he looked higher than a giraffe's vag. I'm stealing that one.
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Old 11-02-2009   #5
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Quote:
Originally Posted by Goatcheese View Post


Now we know why Schaub randomly throws passes 30 feet away from his target. This dudes got the crazy eyes!
woah, guys help me out... I cant find my one shoe...

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Old 11-02-2009   #6
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

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Originally Posted by Malloy View Post
woah, guys help me out... I cant find my one shoe...

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Old 11-02-2009   #7
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dan B. View Post
Kissing Suzy Kolbert is IMO the funniest sports blog out there. Their impersonations of JJ and Wade Phillips are epic. They decided to feature the Texans today. This link leads to a fantasy conversation that isn't exactly G rated, but is awesome nonetheless. Apparently OD read up on mythology and has decided that he, Matt, Slaton, and AJ comprise the four headed beast that is the Chimera. For those that don't already know a Chimera has four heads -- a goat, dragon, and lion spring from it's neck, and the tail is a serpent.



OD wishes to be known as "snake d**k." He likes this because the snake is "sneaky dangerous, like me. No expects a monster to have a snake head around back. Plus, it’s kinda phallic. I could be snake d**k. Like, when other tight ends catch passes, it’s COOOOOLLLLLLEEEEYYYYYY or HEEEEEEAAAAAPPPPPPP or HHHHEEEEEAAAAAATTTTTHHHHHH. For me, Houston fans would go SSSSSNNNNNNAAAAAKKKKKKEEEEEE (you get the picture)."

Slaton and Matt have a little row over who gets to be the lion and who is the goat. Matt maintains he is the lion because "lions don't get benched." Slaton gets a bit upset over this, as one can imagine he would with his fragile ego. AJ, always the peacemaker, agrees to be the goat and deems Steve the lion and Matt the dragon. Why?

"CAUSE I’S THE GREATEST OF ALL TIMES, LITTLE ****** LION. Go get your lionnesses to do your hunting for you, bench b*tch! BBBAAA-AAAAAA-AAAHHHHHH! G.O.A.T.!"
That was great Dan! Good find!!
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Old 11-02-2009   #8
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Allsome. I laughed hard.
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Old 11-02-2009   #9
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

This comment made me laugh out loud
Quote:
Matt Schaub looks higher than giraffe p****.
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Old 11-02-2009   #10
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Quote:
Originally Posted by Goatcheese View Post


Now we know why Schaub randomly throws passes 30 feet away from his target. This dudes got the crazy eyes!
This is the next guy to get caught with a Whizzinator. Guaranteed.
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Old 11-02-2009   #11
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

[quote=Goatcheese;1291169]



Hey! Is that Lewis from Revenge of the Nerds?? Where's the horn-rim glasses and pocket calculator???
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Old 11-02-2009   #12
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Great, great find!
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Old 11-02-2009   #13
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

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Originally Posted by Goatcheese View Post


Separated at birth!
You are so wrong.
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Old 11-03-2009   #14
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

KSK's a good one, yes.
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Old 11-03-2009   #15
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

I sent this to my roommate and he sent me back this:

Remix of Joe Namath accosting Suzie Kolber set to a groovy beat.


It's the greatest remix of anything ever.
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Old 11-03-2009   #16
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Really well done that remix, thanks for the link!
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Old 11-03-2009   #17
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

While this one is good, the Rex Ryan KSK fantasy talk is pure genius.
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Old 11-03-2009   #18
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Quote:
Originally Posted by kcdoubleeagle View Post
Hey! Is that Lewis from Revenge of the Nerds?? Where's the horn-rim glasses and pocket calculator???
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Old 11-03-2009   #19
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Default Re: Who Cares What ESPN Says? KSK Discovered Our Team

Slaton is not the lion because lions dont get benched was the best line. I lol'ed on that one.
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Old 11-05-2009   #20
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Default Texans Four-Headed Monster

*NSFW*

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/...tml#more-20766

pure win.
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