A Light-Hearted Mock Draft - Page 2 - Houston Texans Message Board & Forum

Grid · 01-30-2005

With the 14th pick in the 2005 NFL Draft, the Carolina Panthers select.... BOB! (TE)

Bob wasnt going to declare for the draft, but with a call to Enzyte and a fresh new burst of confidence, he found himself bulking up and preparing for a loooooooong season. Now bob is the new TE for the Carolina Panthers, and his BIG 1st round draft pick contract has him throbbing with an incredible desire to play the game. Yes, Bob is living large down in Carolina, thanks to Enzyte.

powda · 01-30-2005

that may very well be the funniest thing i have ever seen on this message board...thanks bro.....i have to go to the hospital now. i cracked a rib.

ThaShark316 · 01-30-2005

Mel Kiper Jr has reported that the Texans are looking to draft a "king" @ #18....with his basketball career continuing to skyrocket,LeBron James still wants to play WR in the NFL...and the Texans reportedly have interest...stay tuned to see what the Texans do @ 18. Houston will have to find a jersey thats only fit for a king.

dubiouscubanx · 01-30-2005

With the 15th pick in the 2005 NFL Draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select...

Tony Danza

A strong pick for the Chiefs, Danza decided to give up his acting and boxing careers to pursue his dream of playing WR in the NFL. "We feel that Tony will be able to help us throughout the season. His speed and witty sense of humor is the missing piece of our puzzle," Cheifs President Carl D. Peterson said after the pick was made. When asked if he felt that his presence would be felt thoughtout the league, Danza replied, "Definately. I'm the boss!"

dmt217 · 01-31-2005

With the 16th pick in the 2005 draft, the New Orleans Saints select...

The Waterboy. Luck must've been on their side today b/c no one moved up to snatch their "hometown" guy this year.

Anyway, they needed to fill 2 holes on their team, so this pick was a no brainer. The Waterboy will give them the playmaker they desperately need on their LB corps, and he'll give his team a boost in stamina thanks to his "aquatic engineering" skills.

281 · 01-31-2005

With the 17th pick in the 2005 NFL Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals select

LB Terry Tate

The Bengals pass up Jar Jar Binks due to character issues, but in acquiring Tate, they have finally got the kick in the butt they need on and OFF the field. Not only will he destroy opposing running backs at linebacker, but he will also keep the front office in check when it isn't gameday.

dubiouscubanx · 01-31-2005

With the 18th pick in the 2005 NFL Draft, the Houston Texans select...

Don King

Well, Mel Kiper Jr. was right about the Texans drafting a "King", but I think Houston was sending the wrong message. Ever since his teenage years in Cleveland, King has had the dream to play in the NFL. As a center for the local community college, King played all 4 seasons without a botched snap. Although the NFL will take up some serious time out of his life, King will still be promoting upcoming title fights. When asked how he'll be able to juggle both professions, King smiled and said "Only in America!"

**gwallaia** · 01-31-2005

The Arizona Cardinals have consistently been one of NFL's worst franchises. Their draft selection at the #19 spot provides a clue to why.

Wile E. Coyote??

This self-proclaimed Super Genius is about as dumb as they come. He spends his entire life chasing a bird only to be out-smarted and out-manuevered every time. What were the Cardinals thinking?

Dennis Green feels Wile E. will fit into the Arizona defensive backfield and provide them with the defensive stopper they need. This is a terrible pick and the Cardinals have wasted yet another #1.

Wolf · 01-31-2005

gamble by the cards... my thoughts are that wiley may have ADD while in practice.. I mean how is he to concentrate on football when there are cardinals all around... and we know he has trouble with road runners so maybe a cardinal will be his speed.. on the flip side.. if the gamble pays off for arizona... imagine what traps await oppenents next season

**beerlover** · 02-02-2005

with the 21st pick the Jacksonville Jaguars select-

efforting to motivate the players Jack "beerlover" Del Rio comes up with the novel idea of drafting Paul Bunyan to help SPLIT the players into one harmonious & bloodletting battle tested corps.

Sarg01 · 02-02-2005

I thought the Panthers were the guys with the axes ...

Joeymousepad · 02-02-2005

What about 20?

D-ReK · 03-21-2005

I found this thread while searching for something else...This is possibly the funniest thread I've ever seen of this site...LoL...

ledzeppelin229 · 03-22-2005

It's time to revive this thing...

With the 23rd pick, the Baltimore Ravens select:

Speedy Gonzales

While he's only a few inches tall, and a football might crush every bone in his body, Gonzales has incredible endurance and blew away scouts and coaches alike with his blazing speed - Another track star turned wide receiver, coaches are hoping he can provice a spark for Baltimore's struggling passing game.

01-30-2005	#22
powda Hall of Fame Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 2,198 Rep Power: 24382	that may very well be the funniest thing i have ever seen on this message board...thanks bro.....i have to go to the hospital now. i cracked a rib. __________________ Stupid doesn't discriminate.

01-30-2005	#23
ThaShark316 #28 Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Rosharon, TX Age: 27 Posts: 2,277 Rep Power: 8459	Mel Kiper Jr has reported that the Texans are looking to draft a "king" @ #18....with his basketball career continuing to skyrocket,LeBron James still wants to play WR in the NFL...and the Texans reportedly have interest...stay tuned to see what the Texans do @ 18. Houston will have to find a jersey thats only fit for a king. __________________ Trip to the New Meadowlands in 2014? I'm down. You'll get an ELITE QB when you apologize to Warren Moon, Houston

01-31-2005	#25
dmt217 Veteran Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 174 Rep Power: 10	With the 16th pick in the 2005 draft, the New Orleans Saints select... The Waterboy. Luck must've been on their side today b/c no one moved up to snatch their "hometown" guy this year. Anyway, they needed to fill 2 holes on their team, so this pick was a no brainer. The Waterboy will give them the playmaker they desperately need on their LB corps, and he'll give his team a boost in stamina thanks to his "aquatic engineering" skills. Last edited by dmt217; 01-31-2005 at 10:48 AM.

01-31-2005	#26
281 Hall of Fame Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 1,459 Rep Power: 1094	With the 17th pick in the 2005 NFL Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals select LB Terry Tate The Bengals pass up Jar Jar Binks due to character issues, but in acquiring Tate, they have finally got the kick in the butt they need on and OFF the field. Not only will he destroy opposing running backs at linebacker, but he will also keep the front office in check when it isn't gameday. __________________ "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." -Ben Franklin Last edited by 281; 01-31-2005 at 05:27 PM.

01-31-2005	#28
gwallaia Moderator Join Date: Apr 2004 Age: 46 Posts: 6,753 Rep Power: 22986	The Arizona Cardinals have consistently been one of NFL's worst franchises. Their draft selection at the #19 spot provides a clue to why. Wile E. Coyote?? This self-proclaimed Super Genius is about as dumb as they come. He spends his entire life chasing a bird only to be out-smarted and out-manuevered every time. What were the Cardinals thinking? Dennis Green feels Wile E. will fit into the Arizona defensive backfield and provide them with the defensive stopper they need. This is a terrible pick and the Cardinals have wasted yet another #1. __________________ It is impossible to keep your eyes open when you sneeze.

01-30-2005	#21
Grid Hall of Fame Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 4,299 Rep Power: 2271	With the 14th pick in the 2005 NFL Draft, the Carolina Panthers select.... BOB! (TE) Bob wasnt going to declare for the draft, but with a call to Enzyte and a fresh new burst of confidence, he found himself bulking up and preparing for a loooooooong season. Now bob is the new TE for the Carolina Panthers, and his BIG 1st round draft pick contract has him throbbing with an incredible desire to play the game. Yes, Bob is living large down in Carolina, thanks to Enzyte.

01-30-2005	#24
dubiouscubanx waterboy Join Date: Jan 2005 Age: 30 Posts: 2 Rep Power: 0	With the 15th pick in the 2005 NFL Draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select... Tony Danza A strong pick for the Chiefs, Danza decided to give up his acting and boxing careers to pursue his dream of playing WR in the NFL. "We feel that Tony will be able to help us throughout the season. His speed and witty sense of humor is the missing piece of our puzzle," Cheifs President Carl D. Peterson said after the pick was made. When asked if he felt that his presence would be felt thoughtout the league, Danza replied, "Definately. I'm the boss!"

01-31-2005	#29
Wolf 100% Texan Join Date: May 2004 Location: Kerrville Age: 43 Posts: 35,820 Rep Power: 40226	gamble by the cards... my thoughts are that wiley may have ADD while in practice.. I mean how is he to concentrate on football when there are cardinals all around... and we know he has trouble with road runners so maybe a cardinal will be his speed.. on the flip side.. if the gamble pays off for arizona... imagine what traps await oppenents next season __________________ People who say that they don't know what to get me for my birthday have obviously never been to a liquor store

02-02-2005	#30
beerlover Site Contributor Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 11,357 Rep Power: 15075	with the 21st pick the Jacksonville Jaguars select- efforting to motivate the players Jack "beerlover" Del Rio comes up with the novel idea of drafting Paul Bunyan to help SPLIT the players into one harmonious & bloodletting battle tested corps.

02-02-2005	#31
Sarg01 Hall of Fame Join Date: Aug 2004 Age: 37 Posts: 1,152 Rep Power: 11	I thought the Panthers were the guys with the axes ...

02-02-2005	#32
Joeymousepad Rookie Join Date: May 2004 Age: 32 Posts: 49 Rep Power: 0	What about 20? __________________ You mess with the Bull you get the horn. We had a horn in the butt for 4 yrs now

03-21-2005	#33
D-ReK RAWWWRR! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Avalon Age: 28 Posts: 3,406 Rep Power: 684	I found this thread while searching for something else...This is possibly the funniest thread I've ever seen of this site...LoL... __________________ Smoke 'em if you got 'em...

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