Cowboy Jokes - Houston Texans Message Board & Forum

**Andrew6** · 01-05-2009

ANOTHER "HAPPY NEW
YEAR"The Texas State Police are cracking down on speeders heading into Dallas. For the first offense, they give you 2 Dallas Cowboy tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.
Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A. The Dallas Cowboys
Q. What do the Dallas Cowboys and Billy Graham have in common?
A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
Q. How do you keep a Dallas Cowboy out of your yard?
A. Put up a goal post.
Q. What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring?
A. A thief.
Q. What's the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill?
A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Q. How many Dallas Cowboys does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A. Nobody remembers and we will never find out!
Q. What do the Cowboys and a possums have in common?
A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!

Norg · 01-05-2009

its a good year when the cowboys dont make the post season

there time is running out to be a solid fied superbowl team there only so much money u can spend year after year on big players and fail to reach your goals intill the mountain crumbles a little a sets u back 3 years

pluss they lost some draft picks for getting Johnshon

i dont think they we be as good this year getting off to like a 6-0 start

WesmanTexanfan · 01-05-2009

I give a little chuckle every time the Eagle v cowboy game passes through my mind...

**Showtime100** · 01-05-2009

I get the warm fuzzies when I think about the Texan/Titan game.

**Tedc** · 01-05-2009

The funniest Cowboy joke I know is Jerry Jones.

thunderkyss · 01-05-2009

We'll win a play-off game before they do.

stingray · 01-05-2009

I heard Jessica Simpson is worried about her relationship with Tony. He hasn't gotten her a ring.

stingray · 01-05-2009

I heard that Tony Romo was so distraught over the loss over the Eagles that he tried to commit suicide. But the bullet was intercepted.

Joe Texan · 01-05-2009

Please move this to the proper forum Mods. I se no reason the word Cowboy deserves to sit on the

Quote:

The Great Fans of the Houston Texans

forum

Joe Texan · 01-05-2009

Thanks Mods

**StarStruck** · 01-05-2009

Good jokes. After winning only nine games, we deserve it.

Flip up some more, better yet, email them to Valley Ranch. and be sure to sign them. If that doesn't motivate, then we are hopeless.

**HoustonFrog** · 01-05-2009

Quote:

Originally Posted by StarStruck

Good jokes. After winning only nine games, we deserve it.

Flip up some more, better yet, email them to Valley Ranch. and be sure to sign them. If that doesn't motivate, then we are hopeless.

Agree.

I'm just glad that people constantly keep the Cowboys in their thoughts

**mexican_texan** · 01-05-2009

There are reports that Tony Romo tried to shoot himself.

The bullets were intercepted and then he fumbled the gun.

awtysst · 01-06-2009

Here is the joke that won a joke contest that Texans Chick had a couple of years back. Enjoy!

Little Johnny was in his Kindergarten class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up. One boy said,"my daddy is a fireman". A girl said her father was a policeman. Another child told how his dad was a salesman.

Little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, and so the teacher asked him about his father. Little Johnny said, "My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men."

The teacher hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring and took little Johnny aside.

She asked, "Is that really true about your father working in a gay strip club?"

"No" said Johnny, "he really plays for the Dallas Cowboys but I was too embarrassed to say."

**StarStruck** · 01-06-2009

Quote:

Originally Posted by awtysst

Here is the joke that won a joke contest that Texans Chick had a couple of years back. Enjoy!

Little Johnny was in his Kindergarten class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up. One boy said,"my daddy is a fireman". A girl said her father was a policeman. Another child told how his dad was a salesman.

Little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, and so the teacher asked him about his father. Little Johnny said, "My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men."

The teacher hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring and took little Johnny aside.

She asked, "Is that really true about your father working in a gay strip club?"

"No" said Johnny, "he really plays for the Dallas Cowboys but I was too embarrassed to say."

Pretty good since most Little Johnny jokes can't be posted on message boards without editing. However, I heard that one before. I need a new laugh.

**dc_txtech** · 01-06-2009

Here is another old but good joke.

Little Johnny went to class one day and his Dallas Cowboy teacher asked each student what NFL team they were a fan of.

Little Johnny said that he was a fan of the mighty Houston Texans.

The teacher asked him why he was a Texans fan and he said, well my mom is a Texan fan and my dad is a Texan fan.

The teacher "wittily" replied, well what if you mom was a hooker and your dad was a drug addict?

Johnny replied, "well then I guess I would be a Cowboy fan".

**Tedc** · 01-06-2009

A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is a Dallas Cowboy fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Cowboy fans. Everyone in the class raises their hands except one little girl. The teacher looks at the little girl with surprise and says, "Jenny, why didn't you raise your hand?" Jenny replied, "Because I'm not a Cowboy fan!" The still shocked teacher asked, "Well, if you aren't a Cowboy fan, then who are you a fan of?" Jenny answered, "I'm a Texan fan and proud of it!" The teacher couldn't believe her ears. "Jenny, why in the world are you a Texan fan?!" Jenny replied, "Because my mom is a Texan fan, my dad is a Texan fan, so I'm a Texan fan, too!" The teacher answered in a slightly annoyed tone, "That is no reason for you to be a Texan fan! You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mom was a moron and your dad was a moron, what would you be then?!" Jenny smiled and said, "Then I'd be a Dallas Cowboy fan!

Dread-Head · 01-06-2009

...

Joe Texan · 01-06-2009

A man was walking in down town Houston at the start of the 2008 football season. The man saw this Arrogant, obnoxious guy ranting over something a few feet away. He walked over and to see and noticed the Guy was running around like a chicken with his head cut off spouting off "5 superbowl rings, 5 superbowl rings, 5 superbowl rings." He stopped the guy and said "19 to 10"
So the guy pulled out a gun and shot himself.

**StarStruck** · 01-06-2009

A Voice in the Darkness
The Seven Dwarfs were marching through the forest one day they fell in a deep, dark ravine. Snow White, who was following along, peered over the edge of the steep chasm and called out to the fallen dwarfs. From the depths of the dark hole a voice returned, "The Texans are Super Bowl contenders."
Snow White thought to herself, "Thank God... at least Dopey's survived!"

01-05-2009	#1
Andrew6 Site Contributor Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: League City Age: 31 Posts: 3,092 Rep Power: 4660	Cowboy Jokes ANOTHER "HAPPY NEW YEAR"The Texas State Police are cracking down on speeders heading into Dallas. For the first offense, they give you 2 Dallas Cowboy tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them. Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl? A. The Dallas Cowboys Q. What do the Dallas Cowboys and Billy Graham have in common? A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ". Q. How do you keep a Dallas Cowboy out of your yard? A. Put up a goal post. Q. What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring? A. A thief. Q. What's the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill? A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill. Q. How many Dallas Cowboys does it take to win a Super Bowl? A. Nobody remembers and we will never find out! Q. What do the Cowboys and a possums have in common? A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road! __________________ Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.

01-05-2009	#2
Norg Hall of Fame Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,886 Rep Power: 2454	Re: Cowboy Jokes its a good year when the cowboys dont make the post season there time is running out to be a solid fied superbowl team there only so much money u can spend year after year on big players and fail to reach your goals intill the mountain crumbles a little a sets u back 3 years pluss they lost some draft picks for getting Johnshon i dont think they we be as good this year getting off to like a 6-0 start

01-05-2009	#3
WesmanTexanfan SeNior Smack Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Braeswood area Age: 26 Posts: 4,986 Rep Power: 158	Re: Cowboy Jokes I give a little chuckle every time the Eagle v cowboy game passes through my mind... __________________ new sig? Hakeem can stay Thanks Texan Rocky and Brando for the Avatar and Sig!

01-05-2009	#4
Showtime100 Got AJ? Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Austin,Tx Age: 49 Posts: 18,734 Rep Power: 39298	Re: Cowboy Jokes I get the warm fuzzies when I think about the Texan/Titan game. __________________ *Awesome sig by False Start*

01-05-2009	#5
Tedc Hardheaded Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Bull Pen Age: 49 Posts: 5,292 Rep Power: 2402	Re: Cowboy Jokes The funniest Cowboy joke I know is Jerry Jones. __________________ Tedc .......Hardest head in the Blue Crew!

01-05-2009	#6
thunderkyss Hopkins Beyatch Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Pt Arthur Texas Age: 40 Posts: 25,703 Rep Power: 51478	Re: Cowboy Jokes We'll win a play-off game before they do. __________________ I swear it's for real this time!

01-05-2009	#7
stingray Hall of Fame Join Date: May 2006 Location: Brownsville, Tx Age: 40 Posts: 4,699 Rep Power: 9694	Re: Cowboy Jokes I heard Jessica Simpson is worried about her relationship with Tony. He hasn't gotten her a ring.

01-05-2009	#8
stingray Hall of Fame Join Date: May 2006 Location: Brownsville, Tx Age: 40 Posts: 4,699 Rep Power: 9694	Re: Cowboy Jokes I heard that Tony Romo was so distraught over the loss over the Eagles that he tried to commit suicide. But the bullet was intercepted.

01-05-2009	#10
Joe Texan Inducted 04 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Spring Section: 116 row a seat 20 Age: 50 Posts: 9,784 Rep Power: 4089	Re: Cowboy Jokes Thanks Mods __________________ PRAYERS TO THE FALLEN AT FT. HOOD

01-05-2009	#11
StarStruck Site Contributor Join Date: May 2004 Location: Missouri City, Texas Age: 65 Posts: 4,148 Rep Power: 9236	Re: Cowboy Jokes Good jokes. After winning only nine games, we deserve it. Flip up some more, better yet, email them to Valley Ranch. and be sure to sign them. If that doesn't motivate, then we are hopeless.

01-06-2009	#14
awtysst Draft Guru Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 7,611 Rep Power: 2602	Re: Cowboy Jokes Here is the joke that won a joke contest that Texans Chick had a couple of years back. Enjoy! Little Johnny was in his Kindergarten class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up. One boy said,"my daddy is a fireman". A girl said her father was a policeman. Another child told how his dad was a salesman. Little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, and so the teacher asked him about his father. Little Johnny said, "My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men." The teacher hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring and took little Johnny aside. She asked, "Is that really true about your father working in a gay strip club?" "No" said Johnny, "he really plays for the Dallas Cowboys but I was too embarrassed to say." __________________ Draft Guru: 91.43% accuracy through first 35 picks from 2006-present I'm Pro Fig Newton, not Cam Newton! -awtysst on 4/28/2011

01-06-2009	#16
dc_txtech Subscribed Contributor Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Round Rock Age: 30 Posts: 2,166 Rep Power: 13136	Re: Cowboy Jokes Here is another old but good joke. Little Johnny went to class one day and his Dallas Cowboy teacher asked each student what NFL team they were a fan of. Little Johnny said that he was a fan of the mighty Houston Texans. The teacher asked him why he was a Texans fan and he said, well my mom is a Texan fan and my dad is a Texan fan. The teacher "wittily" replied, well what if you mom was a hooker and your dad was a drug addict? Johnny replied, "well then I guess I would be a Cowboy fan".

01-06-2009	#17
Tedc Hardheaded Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Bull Pen Age: 49 Posts: 5,292 Rep Power: 2402	Re: Cowboy Jokes A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is a Dallas Cowboy fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Cowboy fans. Everyone in the class raises their hands except one little girl. The teacher looks at the little girl with surprise and says, "Jenny, why didn't you raise your hand?" Jenny replied, "Because I'm not a Cowboy fan!" The still shocked teacher asked, "Well, if you aren't a Cowboy fan, then who are you a fan of?" Jenny answered, "I'm a Texan fan and proud of it!" The teacher couldn't believe her ears. "Jenny, why in the world are you a Texan fan?!" Jenny replied, "Because my mom is a Texan fan, my dad is a Texan fan, so I'm a Texan fan, too!" The teacher answered in a slightly annoyed tone, "That is no reason for you to be a Texan fan! You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mom was a moron and your dad was a moron, what would you be then?!" Jenny smiled and said, "Then I'd be a Dallas Cowboy fan! __________________ Tedc .......Hardest head in the Blue Crew!

01-06-2009	#18
Dread-Head Hall of Fame Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Houston Texas baby! Age: 43 Posts: 12,671 Rep Power: 42573	Re: Cowboy Jokes ... __________________ Why attack a man for his race or religion when there are so many other PERFECTLY good reasons? Dread-Head. Texan from DAY ONE & PROUD Honorary Blue Crew member..."Damn it Bill!"

01-06-2009	#19
Joe Texan Inducted 04 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Spring Section: 116 row a seat 20 Age: 50 Posts: 9,784 Rep Power: 4089	Re: Cowboy Jokes A man was walking in down town Houston at the start of the 2008 football season. The man saw this Arrogant, obnoxious guy ranting over something a few feet away. He walked over and to see and noticed the Guy was running around like a chicken with his head cut off spouting off "5 superbowl rings, 5 superbowl rings, 5 superbowl rings." He stopped the guy and said "19 to 10" So the guy pulled out a gun and shot himself. __________________ PRAYERS TO THE FALLEN AT FT. HOOD

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01-06-2009	#20
StarStruck Site Contributor Join Date: May 2004 Location: Missouri City, Texas Age: 65 Posts: 4,148 Rep Power: 9236	Re: Cowboy Jokes A Voice in the Darkness The Seven Dwarfs were marching through the forest one day they fell in a deep, dark ravine. Snow White, who was following along, peered over the edge of the steep chasm and called out to the fallen dwarfs. From the depths of the dark hole a voice returned, "The Texans are Super Bowl contenders." Snow White thought to herself, "Thank God... at least Dopey's survived!"

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