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View Full Version : The official "Kubiak can't ____ this up unless he tries really hard" thread


gg no re
09-06-2011, 08:27 PM
http://cache.blippitt.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Popcorn-03-Scarlett-Johanssen.gif

Trap_Star
09-06-2011, 08:42 PM
http://images.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/9810601.jpg

2slik4u
09-06-2011, 09:10 PM
I dont get the popcorn eating chick.....

....on another note, Im tired of everyone assuming this is a given win. This is the NFL fellas, nothing is given to us. Yes Kerry Collins is old. Yes he cant move in the pocket. Yes he is 0-8 vs. Wade Phillips led defenses BUT this is the colts. There are more players on their team that can cause issues here.

Reggie Wayne, Austin Collie, Addai (sometimes) and dont forget our favorite, Dalls Clark.

Guys, I feel extremely confident about winning this game but the title of this thread seems to put the assumption out there that we are guaranteed victory UNLESS Kubiak screws it up or a complete meltdown happens.

Is the possibility of the colts being better than us out there? (Not saying they are at all, just showing the flaw here)

Havent you learned that nothing is guaranteed when you are a Texans fan?

Pantherstang84
09-06-2011, 09:30 PM
I dont get the popcorn eating chick.....

....on another note, Im tired of everyone assuming this is a given win. This is the NFL fellas, nothing is given to us. Yes Kerry Collins is old. Yes he cant move in the pocket. Yes he is 0-8 vs. Wade Phillips led defenses BUT this is the colts. There are more players on their team that can cause issues here.

Reggie Wayne, Austin Collie, Addai (sometimes) and dont forget our favorite, Dalls Clark.

Guys, I feel extremely confident about winning this game but the title of this thread seems to put the assumption out there that we are guaranteed victory UNLESS Kubiak screws it up or a complete meltdown happens.

Is the possibility of the colts being better than us out there? (Not saying they are at all, just showing the flaw here)

Havent you learned that nothing is guaranteed when you are a Texans fan?

No. If the Texans lose, they will beat themselves. This game is that hanging curve right over the plate that batters pray for.

2slik4u
09-06-2011, 09:42 PM
No. If the Texans lose, they will beat themselves. This game is that hanging curve right over the plate that batters pray for.

Any given Sunday my man....

I know it may sound like Im a colts fan......which I can assure you Im not but acting like the game is already won is effing ridiculous.

Nothing is won. Nothing is lost. Dont look ahead to week 2. The fact of the matter remains that we need to act as if NO game is an automatic win because none of them are.

I truly believe that we can win every game on our schedule but even the best lose and its not always because they gave it away or blew it but rather because they got outplayed.

TheMatrix31
09-06-2011, 09:49 PM
Kubiak can do or not do all he wants, but the players ALSO have to perform.

Nothing should be taken for granted. Beat their asses. Make a statement.

Showtime100
09-06-2011, 09:54 PM
I dont get the popcorn eating chick.....



It sort of implies sitting back and watching what happens. :)

gg no re
09-06-2011, 09:57 PM
Guys, I feel extremely confident about winning this game but the title of this thread seems to put the assumption out there that we are guaranteed victory UNLESS Kubiak screws it up or a complete meltdown happens.

Havent you learned that nothing is guaranteed when you are a Texans fan?

well yeah that's the whole idea here.

HouSportsWriter
09-06-2011, 09:57 PM
I dont get the popcorn eating chick.....

Whats not to get! It is a chick eating popcorn.

gg no re
09-06-2011, 09:59 PM
I dont get the popcorn eating chick.....

and that's popcorn eating SCARLETT JOHANSSON to you, mister.

http://www.boomtron.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/scarlett-johansson-iron-man-2-movie-black-widow.jpg

Trap_Star
09-06-2011, 09:59 PM
http://images.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/9812154.jpg

HouSportsWriter
09-06-2011, 10:00 PM
http://cache.blippitt.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Popcorn-03-Scarlett-Johanssen.gif

Watching this makes me hungry...

steelbtexan
09-06-2011, 10:01 PM
If anybody can blow a layup Gary can.

Pantherstang84
09-06-2011, 10:06 PM
Any given Sunday my man....

I know it may sound like Im a colts fan......which I can assure you Im not but acting like the game is already won is effing ridiculous.

Nothing is won. Nothing is lost. Dont look ahead to week 2. The fact of the matter remains that we need to act as if NO game is an automatic win because none of them are.

I truly believe that we can win every game on our schedule but even the best lose and its not always because they gave it away or blew it but rather because they got outplayed.

I just have to act like a fan. I won't lose sleep tossing and turning worrying about how a team will perform during a football game. It is just a game. I can have whatever expectations I feel like having.

It is the team, the players and coaches, that have to worry about preparation for the opponent not me.

In the end, what I say about a game or how I manage my expectations will have nothing, zero, zip ,nada affect on the outcome of it.

I love the game of football on all levels of play. I watch my teams. I cheer them on. But win or lose, it is just a game. That is all it is. My existence, life circumstances or behavior will not be affected by the outcome of it. What is effing ridiculous is people getting worked up over what the media says about their team or worrying that fans are over confident. Puhhhleasse!

There are more important things in life other than the outcome of a game. Win or lose I will still be here and I won't cry over the damn result.

/post

eriadoc
09-06-2011, 10:09 PM
"Kubiak can't ____ this up unless he tries really hard"

Oh, ye of little faith. I believe in the man. I think he has innate talent. He could **** up a challenge call, goal line play call, or entire second half strategy without even really thinking about it.

DocBar
09-06-2011, 10:13 PM
I dont get the popcorn eating chick.....

....on another note, Im tired of everyone assuming this is a given win. This is the NFL fellas, nothing is given to us. Yes Kerry Collins is old. Yes he cant move in the pocket. Yes he is 0-8 vs. Wade Phillips led defenses BUT this is the colts. There are more players on their team that can cause issues here.

Reggie Wayne, Austin Collie, Addai (sometimes) and dont forget our favorite, Dalls Clark.
Guys, I feel extremely confident about winning this game but the title of this thread seems to put the assumption out there that we are guaranteed victory UNLESS Kubiak screws it up or a complete meltdown happens.

Is the possibility of the colts being better than us out there? (Not saying they are at all, just showing the flaw here)

Havent you learned that nothing is guaranteed when you are a Texans fan?I agree that we shouldn't be looking at this game as a gimme, but it's gonna be interesting to see how those receivers look with a mere mortal throwing the ball.
The biggest thing Kubiak could do to screw it up is to forget the week 1 recipe this year like he did in the second game last year. Feed the ball to the RB's and let them do their thing. Hopefully McNair made Kubiak give his red flags to the DC and OC. :goodluck:

HoustonFrog
09-06-2011, 10:17 PM
Watching this makes me hungry...

I just keep watching the arm squish...:)

As far as the thread...it could be about the season. Jags cut Gerrard and seem to be a mess. Colts have Manning injuries. Titans dangerous but who knows. Things seem to be aligning. With that said, I still think Kubiak is a soso if not bad coach so you never know what you are going to get in a game but if he has a shot this is set up for success.

TheRealJoker
09-06-2011, 10:19 PM
The stars are aligning and it looks like the AFC South is gonna be a weak division this year. The only team that got better in the offseason was Houston.

Tennessee is rebuilding and their franchise player just hit the practice field last week. Jacksonville just cut David Garrard in favor of a career backup and rookie QB, they are also rebuilding. Indy may have to deal with life without Peyton for significant time, and when he does get back it's not gonna be like MVP Peyton is gonna immediately appear. Indy isn't rebuilding, they are in the process of imploding.

I want to believe this is the year the Texans finally make the playoffs. The competition is way too screwed up to stop the Texans, who don't have a real Head Coach, but some damn fine coordinators!!!

If Kubiak can find a way NOT to win this NFC West-like division. He will go down in the HOF of Head Coaching duds.

Imatexanfan
09-06-2011, 10:26 PM
I just keep watching the arm squish...:)

LOL me too:doot:

2slik4u
09-06-2011, 10:35 PM
http://images.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/9812154.jpg

I dig this. How can I make this my avatar?

Rep coming your way.

2slik4u
09-06-2011, 10:38 PM
I agree that we shouldn't be looking at this game as a gimme, but it's gonna be interesting to see how those receivers look with a mere mortal throwing the ball.
The biggest thing Kubiak could do to screw it up is to forget the week 1 recipe this year like he did in the second game last year. Feed the ball to the RB's and let them do their thing. Hopefully McNair made Kubiak give his red flags to the DC and OC. :goodluck:

I think we'll see that Collie, Garcon, and probably Addai will be non-existent but Wayne and Clark will get theirs.

Trap_Star
09-06-2011, 10:38 PM
I dig this. How can I make this my avatar?

Rep coming your way.

take it to imageshack to resize.

DocBar
09-06-2011, 10:41 PM
I think we'll see that Collie, Garcon, and probably Addai will be non-existent but Wayne and Clark will get theirs.I agree with this, but I don't think "theirs" will be in much smaller portions, especially early in the season. My gut tells me that a: Manning is probably out for the year and b: I'm hungry, but it's too late to eat. :chef:

MEGA SWATT
09-06-2011, 10:54 PM
I just keep watching the arm squish...:)

.

mm, good eye.:goodpost::monkey:

Texanmike02
09-07-2011, 09:01 AM
Oh, ye of little faith. I believe in the man. I think he has innate talent. He could **** up a challenge call, goal line play call, or entire second half strategy by over thinking it

Fixed.

Mike

thunderkyss
09-07-2011, 10:16 AM
...and dont forget our favorite, Dalls Clark.


There is absolutely no reason this guy should ever get off the line clean. He's going to be their primary weapon. Whatever LB is over him, Barwin/Mario/Reed need to knock the crap out of him before rushing the QB. Then Cushing, Demeco, Quin, or Manning should pick him up.


I know it's going to take away their chances of making a sack, but it will increase the chances of someone else making a sack.

Double Barrel
09-07-2011, 12:15 PM
Oh, ye of little faith. I believe in the man. I think he has innate talent. He could **** up a challenge call, goal line play call, or entire second half strategy without even really thinking about it.

If we get an early lead, expect really conservative playcalling to ensue. Kubiak either believes in protecting a lead, even if it's three points, or has some inner misguided noble desire not to be perceived as running up a score. Either way, he has always lacked the so-called "killer instinct" the past five seasons, and that is what most winning coaches need to finish games.

Maybe Wade's influence as DC will change all that and we can actually protect a small lead with our defense. That would certainly complement Kubiak's past tendencies.

ThaShark316
09-07-2011, 12:16 PM
If we get an early lead, expect really conservative playcalling to ensue. Kubiak either believes in protecting a lead, even if it's three points, or has some inner misguided noble desire not to be perceived as running up a score. Either way, he has always lacked the so-called "killer instinct" the past five seasons, and that is what most winning coaches need to finish games.

Maybe Wade's influence as DC will change all that and we can actually protect a small lead with our defense. That would certainly complement Kubiak's past tendencies.

Remember the Raiders game last year? That should have been 45-14. Kubes sat on that lead.

houstonspartan
09-07-2011, 01:16 PM
If anybody can blow a layup Gary can.

Lol. Yep.

Thorn
09-07-2011, 01:32 PM
If Kubiak can find a way NOT to win this NFC West-like division. He will go down in the HOF of Head Coaching duds.

I think it's still possible that Kubiak will get us within 8 games of an 8-8 record this year.

Lucky
09-07-2011, 07:54 PM
Kubiak can't ____ this up. He can't. There's too much competency in the coaching staff. There's too much talent on both sides of the ball. There's too little competition within the division. This team is Kubiak-proof.

So keep your nose in that menu, Gary. Continue to stay as far away as possible from the players and coaches. In other words, continue to do what you do best. They've got this. Just sit back and enjoy it.

http://scottamillerphoto.visualsociety.com/files/2009/12/Texans_Jags_3167.JPG

Kaiser Toro
09-07-2011, 08:07 PM
Kubiak can't ____ this up. He can't. There's too much competency in the coaching staff. There's too much talent on both sides of the ball. There's too little competition within the division. This team is Kubiak-proof.

So keep your nose in that menu, Gary. Continue to stay as far away as possible from the players and coaches. In other words, continue to do what you do best. They've got this. Just sit back and enjoy it.

http://scottamillerphoto.visualsociety.com/files/2009/12/Texans_Jags_3167.JPG

What if it turned out that Gary Kubiak is actually a Kid?

DocBar
09-07-2011, 08:11 PM
What if it turned out that Gary Kubiak is actually a Kid?And your point is?

Lucky
09-07-2011, 08:24 PM
And your point is?
It's a play on Kubiak's overuse of the term "kid", such as "the kids are working hard", "He's a great kid", "No one's more disappointed than these kids", etc., and the photo where Kubiak goes goat on his playsheet.

I thought it was funny, anyway.

Vinny
09-07-2011, 08:50 PM
I'm not gonna yell at Kubiak this year, unless he makes me (again). I'm kinda in the blind squirrel will find his nut this season groove...this season almost has that Emperor may have found his clothing look and feel to it. Kubiak has a bit more of an in-control feel to him this season for some reason. Probably because Wade was shoved down his throat after his buddy hires didn't pan out, and this is his last tango...but I digress.

In the past he was always confident, but in a fidgety, poor body language sorta way. This season Kubiak will have a more diverse offense, a more aggressive defense, and someone who is at least his equal as a coordinator on the other side of the ball (for the first time). I think he is gonna win one for the kids this season.

God himself could not sink this ship!
- Unknown Titanic crewmember to embarking passenger, Mrs Sylvia Caldwell.

DocBar
09-07-2011, 09:11 PM
It's a play on Kubiak's overuse of the term "kid", such as "the kids are working hard", "He's a great kid", "No one's more disappointed than these kids", etc., and the photo where Kubiak goes goat on his playsheet.

I thought it was funny, anyway.I see, said the blind man.

infantrycak
09-08-2011, 11:07 AM
It's a play on Kubiak's overuse of the term "kid", such as "the kids are working hard", "He's a great kid", "No one's more disappointed than these kids", etc., and the photo where Kubiak goes goat on his playsheet.

I thought it was funny, anyway.

I thought it was funny that when Wade was on the radio after a practice he referred to the players as kids several times as well. Don't know if he has previously done that or picked it up.

houstonspartan
09-08-2011, 11:41 AM
I'm not gonna yell at Kubiak this year, unless he makes me (again). I'm kinda in the blind squirrel will find his nut this season groove...this season almost has that Emperor may have found his clothing look and feel to it. Kubiak has a bit more of an in-control feel to him this season for some reason. Probably because Wade was shoved down his throat after his buddy hires didn't pan out, and this is his last tango...but I digress.

In the past he was always confident, but in a fidgety, poor body language sorta way. This season Kubiak will have a more diverse offense, a more aggressive defense, and someone who is at least his equal as a coordinator on the other side of the ball (for the first time). I think he is gonna win one for the kids this season.

God himself could not sink this ship!
- Unknown Titanic crewmember to embarking passenger, Mrs Sylvia Caldwell.

Lol. Yep. I have always said that behind the stoic facade was a nervous nelly. When the pressure is on Kubiak is CLEARLY affected.

Double Barrel
09-08-2011, 11:47 AM
http://scottamillerphoto.visualsociety.com/files/2009/12/Texans_Jags_3167.JPG

NOM NOM NOM

What if it turned out that Gary Kubiak is actually a Kid?

lol! I dig the duality of meaning, but I'm a goat herder so what can I say... :howdy:

Ranger Tom
09-08-2011, 03:51 PM
Was it last season or the one before that he won the first Colts game with a run-heavy offense, and then decided that 70% pass plays would win the second?

disaacks3
09-08-2011, 03:57 PM
Well, the heat ought to REALLY be on now for winning the division. The forehead is likely done for the season.

Wolf6151
09-09-2011, 06:31 AM
Never underestimate Kubiak's ability to ****** up a free lunch.

edo783
09-10-2011, 01:51 AM
IMO, in Denver, when ever Gary walked into the room, he was the smartest guy there. I think he is learning ( the hard way) that at the HC level, these boys are just as smart and maybe some are touch smarter than you are. He seems to be getting the handle on how to play within himself, and that is a good thing.

House of Pain
09-10-2011, 05:03 AM
IMO, in Denver, when ever Gary walked into the room, he was the smartest guy there. I think he is learning ( the hard way) that at the HC level, these boys are just as smart and maybe some are touch smarter than you are. He seems to be getting the handle on how to play within himself, and that is a good thing.

IIRC, there is an article that talks about how Wade's experience and the way that he carried himself rubbed off on Kubiak. I truly hope all the boneheaded things that he's done can just be chalked up to inexperience. Damn, this Kool-Aid is delicious!

:koolaid:

:kubepalm:

gg no re
09-10-2011, 08:19 AM
IIRC, there is an article that talks about how Wade's experience and the way that he carried himself rubbed off on Kubiak. I truly hope all the boneheaded things that he's done can just be chalked up to inexperience. Damn, this Kool-Aid is delicious!

:koolaid:

:kubepalm:
Until you find out someone slipped in some floorsies for a bonding experience.

Lucky
09-11-2011, 07:06 PM
So keep your nose in that menu, Gary. Continue to stay as far away as possible from the players and coaches. In other words, continue to do what you do best. They've got this. Just sit back and enjoy it.
Once again, Gary was about 30-35 yards away from the rest of the team on most plays. This once bothered me. Now, I'm totally in favor of Kubiak's positioning on the sideline.

Keep reading the menu and talking on the headset. Heck, go upstairs if you think you can get a better vantage point. Let the competent coaches you have on staff deal with the players. It's working. Less is more.

House of Pain
09-16-2011, 07:15 PM
Until you find out someone slipped in some floorsies for a bonding experience.

When someone gives you a Jeffrey, you stroke the furry wall.

False Start
09-16-2011, 08:25 PM
http://img25.imageshack.us/img25/5309/shidkubessayscopy.png

CloakNNNdagger
09-16-2011, 09:23 PM
I dont get the popcorn eating chick.....

....on another note, Im tired of everyone assuming this is a given win. This is the NFL fellas, nothing is given to us. Yes Kerry Collins is old. Yes he cant move in the pocket. Yes he is 0-8 vs. Wade Phillips led defenses BUT this is the colts. There are more players on their team that can cause issues here.

Reggie Wayne, Austin Collie, Addai (sometimes) and dont forget our favorite, Dalls Clark.

Guys, I feel extremely confident about winning this game but the title of this thread seems to put the assumption out there that we are guaranteed victory UNLESS Kubiak screws it up or a complete meltdown happens.

Is the possibility of the colts being better than us out there? (Not saying they are at all, just showing the flaw here)

Havent you learned that nothing is guaranteed when you are a Texans fan?

http://scm-l3.technorati.com/10/04/08/11523/chickens-irs-dependents-hatch-381195.jpg

BUT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.......I'M A TEXANS CHICKEN!

gg no re
10-17-2011, 09:22 PM
bump

I think we can do a progress survey at this point in the season.

TexansFanatic
10-17-2011, 09:49 PM
I'd say it looks like he's trying really hard.

Lucky
10-17-2011, 10:58 PM
Kubiak can't ____ this up. He can't. There's too much competency in the coaching staff. There's too much talent on both sides of the ball. There's too little competition within the division. This team is Kubiak-proof.

Good lord, I'm an idi0t. :kubepalm:

TexansFanatic
10-17-2011, 11:04 PM
Good lord, I'm an idi0t. :kubepalm:

It's okay, brother. We're all suckers here. Just consider TexansTalk your recovery/support group.

My name is TexansFanatic and I'm a sucker fan of the Texans.

Hi, TexansFanatic.

htowntexans1985
10-17-2011, 11:34 PM
Good lord, I'm an idi0t. :kubepalm:


THATS SOME GOOD STUFF THEIR PARTNER. :spit:

silentassassin
10-17-2011, 11:37 PM
Good lord, I'm an idi0t. :kubepalm:

Don't be so hard on yourself, I felt the same way, though all hope is not lost...yet. :vincepalm:

steelbtexan
10-18-2011, 12:05 AM
Good lord, I'm an idi0t. :kubepalm:

Me too

Thanks for pulling off that big Lloyd trade. I mean we just signed a 50 yr old Derrick Mason. We wouldn't want to cut JJ for oh you know a guy that has a clue how to run a route properly and can do that thing I've heard WR's are supposed to do. CATCH the BALL.

Kinda important things for the kids to be able to do dont you think Rick/Gary.

gg no re
11-14-2011, 09:58 PM
So far, it looks like despite Kubiak's modest efforts, the Texans have been sailing the seas fairly well.

However, in light of recent events, I would like to say that I do not consider the temporary loss of Schaub to exempt Kubiak from any ____ing ups that may cost us the division title, and playoff berths if any.

TheMatrix31
11-15-2011, 12:47 AM
If the ****ups are coaching related, then definitely not.

HJam72
11-15-2011, 05:10 AM
I'm still going with 10-6 or it takes a very unlikely playoff win to keep Kubiak.

I wouldn't be that hard on him in this situation, but I saw last year...

gg no re
12-11-2011, 04:39 PM
Congratulations, Gary Wayne Kubiak.

Despite an array of some really good ass excuses sitting in your holster, you did not interject your magic into this team, and our Texans not only made the playoffs but won the division crown.

I deem this thread invalid for the rest of the 2011 season.