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View Full Version : Cushing approves of the Texans new workout regiment.


barrett
05-03-2010, 06:24 PM
via a www.twitter.com post: These workouts are legit, houston texans are looking good man

I figure the dude is qualified to be considered to have an educated opinion.

redwhiteANDblue
05-03-2010, 07:05 PM
If Cushing approves, I approve.

phantom17
05-03-2010, 07:20 PM
If Cushing approves, I approve.

I also think Chuck Norris would approve!:barman:

OzzO
05-03-2010, 07:48 PM
Chuck Norris follows Cushing on twitter.

brakos82
05-03-2010, 07:50 PM
http://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2010/4/23/129165605965656418.gif

False Start
05-03-2010, 08:18 PM
Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Cushing, before he goes to sleep every night.

ObsiWan
05-03-2010, 08:37 PM
Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Cushing, before he goes to sleep every night.

I heard Chuck Norris uses a Brian Cushing nitelight so he won't be skeerd at night...

Carr Bombed
05-03-2010, 08:54 PM
The reason why Chuck Norris casted Jonathan Brandis and not Cushing for his movie "sidekicks" is because he didn't want to end up be Cushing's sidekick.

theanswer000
05-03-2010, 10:51 PM
Go texans

Dutchrudder
05-03-2010, 11:01 PM
Chuck Norris should be the next Texans S&C coach. You know espn would eat that up.

Carr Bombed
05-03-2010, 11:20 PM
Chuck Norris should be the next Texans S&C coach. You know espn would eat that up.

I'd welcome it......he'd have Jones in the corner kneeling on rice after his 1st drop. :foottap:

(speaking of that, kids today act like they're so tough...my dad used to make me do that crap LOL.)

El Tejano
05-03-2010, 11:41 PM
In a failed attempt, Chuck Norris had jokes made about him so he could try and look tougher than Brian Cushing.

The Most Interesting Man in The World on Brian Cushing:

"I wish I was him"

Texan_Bill
05-03-2010, 11:57 PM
Pigeon approves!!!!!

FirstTexansFan
05-04-2010, 05:18 AM
Best Thread Eva! So many rep points to hand out, my clicking index finger is wore out... :)

Blake
05-04-2010, 07:55 AM
I guess this guy knows a thing or two about legit workouts. Good stuff.

2slik4u
05-04-2010, 08:50 AM
Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Cushing, before he goes to sleep every night.

Underneath Cushing's Cush hawk is no skull, only another Cush hawk.

HuttoKarl
05-04-2010, 08:55 AM
Brian Cushing is the one who makes the caged bird sing.

Brian Cushing does not like to wait. He couldn't care less if patience is a virtue.

TimeKiller
05-04-2010, 10:42 AM
Brian Cushing's tears can cure cancer. Too bad he's never cried. Ever.

False Start
05-04-2010, 11:17 AM
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Cushing pajamas. :superman:

rmartin65
05-04-2010, 11:18 AM
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Cushing pajamas. :superman:

Let's edit that a little:

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. And Chuck Norris wears Cushing pajamas.

False Start
05-04-2010, 11:20 AM
Pigeon approves!!!!!

Cush > Pigeon

Austrian
05-04-2010, 11:29 AM
Brian Cushing doesn't use sun blocker, the sun uses Cush blocker.

False Start
05-04-2010, 11:32 AM
Cush can touch MC Hammer.

Cush will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

HuttoKarl
05-05-2010, 09:04 AM
If life gives you Brian Cushing, don't even try to make lemonade.

SAMURAITEXAN
05-05-2010, 09:09 AM
Cush can touch MC Hammer.

Cush will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Cush doesn't touch MC Hammer, he just hammers MC.

Go Texans!!!

wagonhed
05-05-2010, 09:17 AM
This is how legends are born. :fans:

JWarren14
05-05-2010, 10:37 AM
When Cushing goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

He said on his Facebook page he was so sore he couldn't walk.

ChampionTexan
05-05-2010, 11:26 AM
Superman wears Brian Cushing underoos (which were lovingly sewn for him by Chuck Norris).

b0ng
05-05-2010, 11:38 AM
Maybe we'll get to see Mr. Cushing manhandle CJ hard enough to make his gold teef exit his mouth.

Malloy
05-05-2010, 03:58 PM
This is funny stuff folks, keep it coming :)

JWarren14
05-05-2010, 05:39 PM
I was watching TV and the host said "don't try this at home...unless your name is Brian Cushing"

brakos82
05-05-2010, 06:15 PM
Brian Cushing can divide by zero.

Brisco_County
05-05-2010, 06:18 PM
I bet I could tap out Cushing. :joker:

wagonhed
05-05-2010, 06:35 PM
Brian Cushing is so awesome his name is brain crushing.

Austrian
05-05-2010, 06:35 PM
When Brian Cushing stares in the sky, the clouds start to sweat out of fear. We call this rain.

GP
05-05-2010, 06:35 PM
Brian Cushing can eat a crowbar and poop an anvil.

Spled
05-05-2010, 07:04 PM
Treating 225 like it was 25 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcxMsC3ny8g

The Pencil Neck
05-05-2010, 07:06 PM
During an extremely hard workout, Brian Cushing ripped the fabric of space/time and travelled back in time to the age of the dinosaurs. He landed at what is now Chicxulub creating a horrible crater in the process. His impact was so great that he created a firestorm that covered part of the earth and a cloud of ashe that covered the rest.

And that's how the dinosaurs really went extinct.

JB
05-05-2010, 07:13 PM
During an extremely hard workout, Brian Cushing ripped the fabric of space/time and travelled back in time to the age of the dinosaurs. He landed at what is now Chicxulub creating a horrible crater in the process. His impact was so great that he created a firestorm that covered part of the earth and a cloud of ashe that covered the rest.

And that's how the dinosaurs really went extinct.

Wow! This almost totally agrees with the facts. In actuality, the crater & firestorm were from the fight where he whooped Godzilla's ass. And that is the true reason behind the demise of the dinosaurs!

b0ng
05-05-2010, 07:14 PM
Brian Cushing would kill all of you with his tackles if he found out we were comparing him to the lowly Chuck Norris.

Cjeremy635
05-05-2010, 10:08 PM
Cush > Pigeon

I don't know man...that's one tough f'n bird!

http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/io9/2009/11/hemantop.jpg

brakos82
05-05-2010, 10:11 PM
I don't know man...that's one tough f'n bird!

http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/io9/2009/11/hemantop.jpg

:whistles:
:penalty:
Unawesomenesslike counduct, Offense, #635. One free piss-knocking-out-of, repeat 2nd down.
:whistles:

BigTimeTexanFan
05-05-2010, 10:26 PM
When Brian Cushing rubs his eyes after chopping jalapeņos, it does not sting, it only makes him stronger.

SouthSideTexan
05-05-2010, 10:53 PM
Chuck Norris can walk on water, but Brian Cushing can swim through land.

Cjeremy635
05-05-2010, 11:06 PM
Fine:

http://comedydoneright.webs.com/ChuckNorrisApproved.png

Cjeremy635
05-05-2010, 11:14 PM
This is what Cushing sees when he thinks of Chuck Norris:

http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e5/Skorp88/EmoStudent/ChuckEmo.jpg

SouthSideTexan
05-05-2010, 11:24 PM
Peyton Manning can throw a football 50 yards, Brian Cushing can throw Peyton manning even further.

Pollardized
05-06-2010, 07:07 AM
Brian Cushing was also known as Gunnery Sgt Highway, in another life.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QqM_tPumTZI

Drank more beer, pissed more blood, busted more heads, and banged more quiff than all of you numb nuts put together

otisbean
05-06-2010, 07:21 AM
A Brian Cushing tackle is the preferred method of execution in 37 states.

The world thinks we dropped an H-bomb on Japan, actually we unleashed Brian Cushing.

When Brian Cushing does a pushup he pushes the world down.

The tsunami in Thailand was the result of a Brian Cushing cannonball in LA

HuttoKarl
05-06-2010, 09:01 AM
Brian Cushing once pulled a single hair from his Cush-hawk and skewered three men through the heart with it.

El Tejano
05-06-2010, 09:27 AM
Brian Cushing has a hyperbaric chamber....nuff said.

Seņor Stan
05-06-2010, 09:48 AM
Brian Cushing has a hyperbaric chamber....

only because they stopped making phone booths a while back.

TheIronDuke
05-06-2010, 11:17 AM
Brian Cushing never wet his bed as a child, the bed wet itself out of fear.

When J. Robert Oppenheimer said "I am become death, the destroyer of worlds" he was not talking about the atomic bomb. He was referring to the Brian Cushing jersey he was wearing.

Brian Cushing does not read books, he stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Brian Cushing can win a game of Connect 4 in only 3 moves.

Texan_Bill
05-06-2010, 11:19 AM
Fine:

http://comedydoneright.webs.com/ChuckNorrisApproved.png

Cush>Pigeon>Chuck Norris

HuttoKarl
05-06-2010, 11:45 AM
They tried to put Brian Cushing on Mt. Rushmore but the granite wasn't tough enough for his Cush-hawk.

The Pencil Neck
05-06-2010, 02:28 PM
There is an erroneous report out that Cushing is learning MMA techniques from Liddell and Glazer.

The truth is, they're learning new techniques from Cushing. Cushing is a font of MA knowledge and a reincarnated Master of Sinanju.

Cjeremy635
05-06-2010, 06:47 PM
This is Chuck after one week on Cushing's "approved workout":

http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20070305004936/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/3/33/UltimateChuck.jpg/200px-UltimateChuck.jpg

I'd definately say he approves!

Carr Bombed
05-07-2010, 06:04 PM
This is Chuck after one week on Cushing's "approved workout":

http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20070305004936/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/3/33/UltimateChuck.jpg/200px-UltimateChuck.jpg

Wouldn't doubt it....

Sorry, the "Cushing approves" anything workout related isn't sounding so appealing anymore.

The Pencil Neck
05-07-2010, 06:06 PM
Wouldn't doubt it....

Sorry, the "Cushing approves" anything workout related isn't sounding so appealing anymore.

Cushing is such a beast that his test/epi-test ratio is naturally unnaturally high.

(I want to see what he tested positive for, though.)

ObsiWan
05-07-2010, 07:37 PM
Cushing is such a beast that his test/epi-test ratio is naturally unnaturally high.

(I want to see what he tested positive for, though.)

funny how no details have been revealed...
If the network knows he flunked, they should have a copy of the lab report - at least I would think so. Especially if he appealed way back in Feb.

Rey
05-07-2010, 07:38 PM
This is Chuck after one week on Cushing's "approved workout":

http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20070305004936/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/3/33/UltimateChuck.jpg/200px-UltimateChuck.jpg

I'd definately say he approves!

Forshadowing?

brakos82
05-07-2010, 09:00 PM
Brian Cushing does not take steroids. Steroids take Brian Cushing.

gtexan02
05-07-2010, 10:29 PM
I feel guilty for what we did to Chuck Norris.

I'll wait until I see Cushing without performance boosting drugs to praise him again. He's a cheater. No other way to describe it.

wagonhed
05-08-2010, 01:25 AM
http://www.foodpoisonjournal.com/uploads/image/ostrich_head_in_ground_full.jpg

ObsiWan
05-08-2010, 08:16 PM
I feel guilty for what we did to Chuck Norris.

I'll wait until I see Cushing without performance boosting drugs to praise him again. He's a cheater. No other way to describe it.

Suppose he took Sudafed and that caused the failed test?

is he still a "cheater"??

JB
05-08-2010, 08:19 PM
Suppose he took Sudafed and that caused the failed test?

is he still a "cheater"??

Apparantly that does not matter to some...

JWarren14
05-13-2010, 03:13 PM
Even tumors can't slow down Brian Cushing!

GP
05-13-2010, 03:16 PM
He can just rip out the tumor with his bare hands.

Hasn't done it yet because he's trying to give it a fair shot.

Cushing > Tumor > Pigeon

otisbean
05-13-2010, 05:37 PM
I feel guilty for what we did to Chuck Norris.

I'll wait until I see Cushing without performance boosting drugs to praise him again. He's a cheater. No other way to describe it.

You are wrong my friend! See my thread on tainted supplements before you judge. BTW, he tested positive in Sept for a VERY slightly elevated level, yet tested clean all year and played like a beast all year. IF he took roids you would have see a drop in performance, ala Merriman.

brakos82
05-14-2010, 01:00 AM
Brian Cushing has attempted to tackle Earl Campbell only once. This event resulted in the Big Bang.