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Texans_Chick
06-29-2009, 08:47 AM
Howdy. I know it is the deep offseason, and I was hoping you could help me with a project. I wrote a blog post called What if the Houston Texans were directed by Michael Bay (http://blogs.chron.com/texanschick/2009/06/what_if_the_houston_texans_wer.html).

It's based on a Cracked.com photoshop contest called If Everyday Life Was Directed by Michael Bay (http://www.cracked.com/forums/topic/49257/photoshop-contest-ending-6.23.09-if-everyday-life-was-directed-by-michael-bay). Winners here (http://www.cracked.com/article_17527_if-everyday-life-was-directed-by-michael-bay.html). (Warning: Very funny but some naughty bits).

I asked my blog readers to comment on their version of the Houston Texans as seen by Michael Bay, but I think it would be fun to do a photoshop contest.

So I am asking for photoshops of "If the Houston Texans were directed by Michael Bay." Your version.

Rules:

1. This is hard to do, but it can't be something so inappropriate that I can't put it in a family newspaper blog.

2. Needs to be funny. Obvious.

3. Winners get their photoshops put in the Chron blog, and the admiration of all of us who love the funny distraction.

So please kickass. :cool:

markn
06-29-2009, 08:59 PM
OK, I'll start the ball rolling...

http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/7961/baytexans.jpg

Texans_Chick
06-30-2009, 07:47 AM
Okay, that is not nearly kickass enough. Like at all.

Here's a fun comment I got on the blog post this morning:


All I will say is this: Michael Bay with access to a retractable roof stadium? Which sits next to the world's first domed stadium that many consider a precious landmark? And both are located in the Oil Capital of the world?

Good gobbly. That film would make Transformers seem like a gentle nature film.

GermanTexan
07-01-2009, 05:28 AM
Something like this?

JDizzle
07-01-2009, 10:35 AM
What's the latest we can submit?

spurstexanstros
07-01-2009, 01:39 PM
Howdy. I know it is the deep offseason, and I was hoping you could help me with a project. I wrote a blog post called What if the Houston Texans were directed by Michael Bay (http://blogs.chron.com/texanschick/2009/06/what_if_the_houston_texans_wer.html).

It's based on a Cracked.com photoshop contest called If Everyday Life Was Directed by Michael Bay (http://www.cracked.com/forums/topic/49257/photoshop-contest-ending-6.23.09-if-everyday-life-was-directed-by-michael-bay). Winners here (http://www.cracked.com/article_17527_if-everyday-life-was-directed-by-michael-bay.html). (Warning: Very funny but some naughty bits).

I asked my blog readers to comment on their version of the Houston Texans as seen by Michael Bay, but I think it would be fun to do a photoshop contest.

So I am asking for photoshops of "If the Houston Texans were directed by Michael Bay." Your version.

Rules:

1. This is hard to do, but it can't be something so inappropriate that I can't put it in a family newspaper blog.

2. Needs to be funny. Obvious.

3. Winners get their photoshops put in the Chron blog, and the admiration of all of us who love the funny distraction.

So please kickass. :cool:

Hmmm ok so something with a huge budget and gets bad reviews and most of the time bad results......sounds like our defensive line. Where can I find a pick of them letting David Gerrard rund for a 4th and 8? I think that would win.

JDizzle
07-01-2009, 01:59 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v373/jmott1/duntaspeak.jpg

powerfuldragon
07-01-2009, 02:38 PM
this thread needs more explosions and mindless dialogue.

powerfuldragon
07-01-2009, 02:43 PM
http://www.cracked.com/video_17320_breakfast-as-directed-by-michael-bay.html
(breakfast directed by michael bay)

gtexan02
07-01-2009, 02:56 PM
How about this one?

http://img10.imageshack.us/img10/8692/texanscopy.jpg

Buffi2
07-01-2009, 04:08 PM
I never heard of Michael Bay until today - what can I say? I'm old and live in the middle of nowhere. Undeterred by a lack of information, I decided I would playhttp://farm3.static.flickr.com/2487/3679717054_21023babfa.jpg

JDizzle
07-01-2009, 04:10 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v373/jmott1/seatingchart.jpg

DiehardChris
07-01-2009, 10:27 PM
Not my best effort - but I'm kind of in a rush and won't be at the comp much in the next few days...

http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x178/TravisBickle17/SCArmageddon.jpg

gtexan02
07-02-2009, 09:35 AM
When do we find out the results?

GermanTexan
07-06-2009, 01:21 PM
http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/5717/texansformers.jpg (http://img44.imageshack.us/i/texansformers.jpg/)

Hookem Horns
07-06-2009, 04:03 PM
http://img200.imageshack.us/img200/5537/fatheaddraft06c.jpg

Texans_Chick
07-10-2009, 12:18 PM
Dudes. Sorry I haven't responded. I was out of town for the 4th.

These are awesome. Keep on putting them up. There is no one winner. I am going to definitely put multiple ones up on the website because they are awesome.

Texans_Chick
07-10-2009, 12:25 PM
Hmmm ok so something with a huge budget and gets bad reviews and most of the time bad results......sounds like our defensive line. Where can I find a pick of them letting David Gerrard rund for a 4th and 8? I think that would win.

No no no.

If Michael Bay was directing the Texans they would be totally bad ass, in a totally unrealistic bad ass over the top way. With explosions and cool gadgets and unreasonably attractive people, especially the ladies that really have no connection to the action.

Michael Bay is not intending to make bad movies. He is intending to make movies that appeal to teenage boys, and menfolk who have the hearts of teenage boys.

Continue to kick ass, Texan fans. It's not like there is anything else going on unless you like to wait for more famous people to die. You will soon see some of these creations on the blog....

Texans_Chick
07-10-2009, 12:30 PM
http://www.cracked.com/video_17320_breakfast-as-directed-by-michael-bay.html
(breakfast directed by michael bay)

Hahahaha. That is awesome.

Texans_Chick
07-11-2009, 03:48 PM
Here they are:

If the Houston Texans were directed by Michael Bay photoshop fun and link roundup (http://blogs.chron.com/texanschick/2009/07/if_the_houston_texans_were_dir_1.html)

I think I might use some others for future posts.