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CloakNNNdagger
04-24-2014, 05:34 PM
Rick Smith Tricked By Staff, Flies To New York Two Weeks Early For NFL Draft (http://www.battleredblog.com/2014/4/23/5643982/battle-red-onion-rick-smith-tricked-flies-new-york-nfl-draft)



HOUSTON, TX-- Seldom does a plan come together so perfectly when it involves so many moving pieces. Through sheer determination, guile, and a little luck, the entire Houston Texans organization has tricked their general manager Rick Smith into thinking the 2014 NFL Draft was still going to take place on its usual late-April weekend and convinced him to fly to New York early this morning to attend it.

Sources say fits of raucous laughter could be heard throughout the Texans facility after Smith, clearly oblivious, left for the airport after stopping in to give his staff some final instructions. "He was so stern and serious," said Brian Gaine, Director of Pro Personnel in between giggles. "He was prattling on and on about remaining sharp and how important this weekend was going to be. Thank God he left when he did because I almost ruined the whole thing trying not to laugh."

"It started off innocently enough," chuckled new head coach Bill O'Brien, wiping laughter tears from his eyes. "We realized last week that he was preparing for the draft as if there still wasn't almost a month to go. He was trying to cram in as many visits and interviews as possible this week. Why else would we bring in [Johnny] Manziel and [Jadeveon] Clowney in on the same day?"

This year's draft was pushed back to May 8th due to a scheduling conflict at Radio City Music Hall, but somehow, some way, Smith did not know about it. For the last week, O'Brien has made sure that everyone inside the facility went to painstaking measures to make sure it stayed that way. That meant no televisions in the office, no NFL correspondence within sight and no direct interaction with the media. Smith's wife Tiffany was all too eager to lend a hand, explained O'Brien. "She said something about him not taking out the garbage, I don't know."

Even owner Bob McNair had a hand in it. "Yeah, when Bill [O'Brien] came up to me begging to keep this joke he had started, I was skeptical. I mean, we're running a business here and trying to win games," explained McNair, shaking his head. "But then I thought, this is the guy who drafted Sam Montgomery in the third round, and I told him, 'sign me up!'"

McNair went on to explain that he even convinced Smith that there was an error in the budget appropriations for his flight and hotel. "I told him we'd pay him back," said McNair, laughing hysterically. "And he bought it!" After several minutes of laughter, McNair made sure to clarify that his pun was intended.

Smith, who's entering his eighth year as the Texans' GM, reportedly wondered why no one was going with him. "It was almost too easy," explained O'Brien. "We held up random pieces of paper and told him our flight was leaving later today." He went on to mimic Smith by dumbly nodding his head while holding imaginary luggage, much to the delight of all the staff in the room.

"I feel a little bad, but then I remember the whole Ed Reed fiasco, and I wonder how he even has his job," pondered McNair, apparently not realizing the irony in his statement. "Maybe I'll have his credit card suspended while he's over there... that'd be a hoot, wouldn't it?"

Calls to Rick Smith, whose flight landed in New York at 11 a.m. CDT, were not immediately returned.

The Pencil Neck
04-24-2014, 06:32 PM
They had me tricked -- and very worried about Rick Smith -- until the Sam Montgomery line.

:vincepalm:

badboy
04-24-2014, 06:47 PM
Ha ha ha signed Ric Smith

drs23
04-24-2014, 07:06 PM
'Bout time for some humor in this LOOOONG offseason. Wasn't really too difficult to discern it was BS but it was entertaining none the less.

Rep for you Doc. I needed a chuckle after today. :)

edit: must spread and all that...

Norg
04-24-2014, 07:12 PM
FIRE RICK smith PLZZZ

Thorn
04-24-2014, 07:14 PM
Is there a reason to send Rick Smith out of town on his own? :thinking:

Playoffs
04-24-2014, 08:19 PM
Rick Smith Flies Into Smelly Situation
CloakNNNdagger

In New Posts is just ahead of...

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Coinkydink? I think not.

Vinny
04-24-2014, 08:41 PM
kinda gives further clues to Smith's mentality.

IDEXAN
04-24-2014, 10:10 PM
I dunno, is this April 1st ?

The Pencil Neck
04-24-2014, 11:30 PM
kinda gives further clues to Smith's mentality.

http://memecrunch.com/meme/5FH/not-sure-if-serious-fry/image.png

bckey
04-25-2014, 05:20 AM
They had me tricked -- and very worried about Rick Smith -- until the Sam Montgomery line.

:vincepalm:


That is the exact same line that gave it away for me. Man, that would have been really hilarious if they could have pulled off something like that for real.

Trail.Blazr
04-25-2014, 07:23 AM
This seems to be too stupid to be true. If it was a real practical joke, it really serves poorly to any credibility Rick may have in terms of being qualified for his job. I'm calling the whole story BS. If god has any love for the Texans, it has to be.

QuiGonGinNTonic
04-25-2014, 07:49 AM
This seems to be too stupid to be true. If it was a real practical joke, it really serves poorly to any credibility Rick may have in terms of being qualified for his job. I'm calling the whole story BS. If god has any love for the Texans, it has to be.
agreed, but i don't think rick would take it too seriously if this where a joke after all its a good way to get to know each other better in my opinion anyway :barman:

steelbtexan
04-25-2014, 07:59 AM
agreed, but i don't think rick would take it too seriously if this where a joke after all its a good way to get to know each other better in my opinion anyway :barman:

If true, (Which obviously this is a spoof) you would be OK with your GM being a dumba** ?

These kinds of fans I just don't get. I want the best and brightest working for the Texans. From the janitor on up the food chain ending with the GM.

QuiGonGinNTonic
04-25-2014, 08:23 AM
If true, (Which obviously this is a spoof) you would be OK with your GM being a dumba** ?

These kinds of fans I just don't get. I want the best and brightest working for the Texans. From the janitor on up the food chain ending with the GM.
this doesn't mean he's a dumba$$, he had no clue they where playing a joke on him, we all make mistakes.

thetexanator
04-25-2014, 08:34 AM
the not so funny part is that I could actually see this happening.

Troy Chapman
04-25-2014, 08:42 AM
Amazed at who would think this was a real story.

nero THE zero
04-25-2014, 08:45 AM
Pretty good satire piece.

Is this true, though?
This year's draft was pushed back to May 8th due to a scheduling conflict at Radio City Music Hall

I hope so. Not a fan of the later draft.

Troy Chapman
04-25-2014, 09:19 AM
Yes that part is true. Hopefully next year's draft will be back in the normal late April time slot.

DocBar
04-25-2014, 10:16 AM
They had me tricked -- and very worried about Rick Smith -- until the Sam Montgomery line.

:vincepalm:I clicked on the link before reading it and knew it was a spoof as soon as I saw "onion".

I can't believe anyone thinks this is real or, if it was, that Rick Smith would be OK with being made a fool of. :smiliepalm:

CloakNNNdagger
04-25-2014, 12:27 PM
Pretty good satire piece.

Is this true, though?


I hope so. Not a fan of the later draft.

Pretty good satire piece.

Is this true, though?


I hope so. Not a fan of the later draft.


Despite what Goodell is saying now in response to negative fan and media feedback, he loves that so many of the talking heads and the rest of the world propogate talking about everything the Draft. Next year, Radio City Hall is also already booked like it was this year.......not allowing the NFL Draft to be held there at its old time. I seriously doubt that they will change to foreign venues........another convenient excuse. And now a FOUR day event? I could hardly make it through last year's final picks.


The NFL has their own version of an old idiom: “If it ain’t broke, keep fixing it.”The league moved back the 2014 NFL draft two weeks from April to May, and Roger Goodell told NFL Media’s Jeff Darlington on Friday that more changes could be in order for the 2015 event.

Goodell said the draft could be moved back to April next year, and that it might not be in Radio City Music Hall. He also said the NFL is considering making the draft a four-day event, though it would stay seven rounds.

ProFootballTalk reported that agents, and at least one general manager don’t like the draft being pushed back two weeks. There has been a long stretch from free agency to the draft.link (http://nesn.com/2014/04/roger-goodell-2015-nfl-draft-date-not-decided-could-be-four-days/)

Vance87
04-25-2014, 01:00 PM
Whatever makes the NFL the most money, Goodell will do.

The Pencil Neck
04-25-2014, 02:14 PM
Whatever makes the NFL the most money, Goodell will do.

Well.

I mean.

That IS his job, isn't it?

DBCooper
04-25-2014, 02:24 PM
Poor Rick, doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground...........

thetexanator
04-25-2014, 02:49 PM
I clicked on the link before reading it and knew it was a spoof as soon as I saw "onion".

I can't believe anyone thinks this is real or, if it was, that Rick Smith would be OK with being made a fool of. :smiliepalm:

hes lucky to still have a job. hed better be cool with it.

Vance87
04-25-2014, 03:56 PM
Well.

I mean.

That IS his job, isn't it?

I'm just saying.

Thorn
04-25-2014, 04:17 PM
Well.

I mean.

That IS his job, isn't it?

LOL and MSR and other internet acronyms and stuff.

Seegara
04-25-2014, 08:30 PM
What if the joke makes Smith mad and he publicizes the Texans' draft intentions and then resigns?

DocBar
04-25-2014, 11:06 PM
What if the joke makes Smith mad and he publicizes the Texans' draft intentions and then resigns?Then you accept his resignation and break out the "real" draft board. :spit:

ObsiWan
04-26-2014, 07:14 PM
Whatever makes the NFL the most money, Goodell will do.

Well.

I mean.

That IS his job, isn't it?

Silly me. I thought his job was to keep his customer base (the fans) happy and buying his product; not to continuously piss off his customer base.
:shades:

thunderkyss
04-26-2014, 07:36 PM
Silly me. I thought his job was to keep his customer base (the fans) happy and buying his product; not to continuously piss off his customer base.
:shades:

The draft & the combine...


I would think it would make the NFL a lot more money to move it to different venues every year. Have cities bid on them just like they bid on the Super Bowl.

ObsiWan
04-27-2014, 01:56 AM
The draft & the combine...


I would think it would make the NFL a lot more money to move it to different venues every year. Have cities bid on them just like they bid on the Super Bowl.
I think Goodell actually mentioned that idea. If I were he, I'd move it from Radio City since they kinda screwed the NFL around this year anyway. The NFL could make it a package with the Super Bowl or let the city that "came in 2nd" in the SB sweepstakes host the draft.

steelbtexan
04-27-2014, 09:20 AM
What if the joke makes Smith mad and he publicizes the Texans' draft intentions and then resigns?

I would be fine with this.

no chance

steelbtexan
04-27-2014, 09:26 AM
I think Goodell actually mentioned that idea. If I were he, I'd move it from Radio City since they kinda screwed the NFL around this year anyway. The NFL could make it a package with the Super Bowl or let the city that "came in 2nd" in the SB sweepstakes host the draft.

Lets see the draft has been at RCMH for many yrs on the last weekend in April and they just happen to schedule something the same weekend?

Or more likely, RMCH is running cover for God'ell's real agenda, moving the draft back to the TV sweeps week in May.

ArlingtonTexan
04-27-2014, 09:59 AM
Lets see the draft has been at RCMH for many yrs on the last weekend in April and they just happen to schedule something the same weekend?

Or more likely, RMCH is running cover for God'ell's real agenda, moving the draft back to the TV sweeps week in May.

and the best part is that the event was cancelled due to lack of public interest. So can we call something a conspiracy when it is so obvious??

steelbtexan
04-27-2014, 10:04 AM
and the best part is that the event was cancelled due to lack of public interest. So can we call something a conspiracy when it is so obvious??

I wouldn't look for the draft to be moved anytime soon as payback for RMCH running cover.

Your thoughts?

CloakNNNdagger
04-27-2014, 10:43 AM
Lets see the draft has been at RCMH for many yrs on the last weekend in April and they just happen to schedule something the same weekend?

Or more likely, RMCH is running cover for God'ell's real agenda, moving the draft back to the TV sweeps week in May.

Curious how last month RMCH announced that the entire 5 week run of the Rockettes show was cancelled........because it wasn't prepared to go. After a year on the schedule, a year to prepare, the show is not ready to go?????? Hmmm:chef:

ObsiWan
04-27-2014, 11:05 AM
I agree with John Clayton (http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/9299440/nfl-careful-calendar), Goodell is about to screw this up if he permanently moves the draft....

When it comes to pushing back the draft, I wish that time would be spent reconsidering the move long-term. If there is a long-term change, it's a mistake to push the draft back to May. The thought is to move the 2014 draft from April 25 to May 8 or May 15, the 2015 draft to May 7 and the 2016 draft to May 7.

The problem is going to affect the coaches more than the fans. Fans would follow the draft if it were held in July. That's not the problem. The concern is preparation. Coaches in 2014 would have three fewer weeks to prepare rookies for training camp.

It's almost setting up a scenario in which many college coaches would be better suited to handle the NFL offseason than first-time NFL assistants. College coaches are accustomed to short preparation time. They have a limited number of spring practices and a short time before the start of the season to prepare the college players.

Look at the problems in 2014. Coaches would have a little less than a month to coach up the rookies. Under the current rules, rookie minicamps can be held during the first two weeks in May.

A May 15 draft would all but eliminate the rookie minicamps. Rookies would have to report to the OTAs and learn the playbook in a couple of weeks. Many of the final minicamps are held during the first two weeks in June, with a few going into the third week.

But by June 20, teams shut down for a month.

Stop trying to fix something that ain't broke Roger
:bat:

texanhead08
04-27-2014, 11:52 AM
Its also unbelievable that the NFL needs basically 3 months from the end of their season and 4 months from the end of the college season to have a draft. The NBA drafts a week after the Finals and MLB has theirs in the middle of the season with no issues.